.: CIKITITA :.

Bersih 2.0

2011-07-10T13:53:00.003+02:00

In my personal opinion, Bersih 2.0 is a strategy that is used to divide the Malays.

It is politically motivated, and funded by an organization that wants to create instability and chaos in the country.

Wake up my fellow Malays, open your eyes and look around.

The current government is not perfect, but in politics, it is about choosing the lesser evil.

Tuesday post

2011-06-14T04:55:00.004+02:00

M.Y says happiness is an emotion, not a destination.

True.

I once read that wherever you are now is a product of what you wished for years ago.

This one is true too, I think.

But what do you do when all your wishes come true?

Do you thank God for his love and mercy, or do you still complain and ask for more?

Halaqah

2011-03-16T02:55:00.003+01:00

I was surfing the net earlier and found this website called halaqah.net. The title on top of the page says Halaqah - Islam Untuk Semua. I don't know about others, but I do feel that some of the questions posted on the site were pretty...well...weird. This is an example of one...

"Apakah hukum menggunakan trolley di pasaraya kerana ianya mungkin telah digunakan untuk produk non-halal?"

This is what one of them answered...

"Sebab itulah orang yg benar-benar warak akan mengeluarkan duit dari dompet ketika ingin sembahyang. Malahan ada yg mengeluarkan dompet, dikhuatiri duit tersebut dipegang oleh penjual barang non-halal".

Errr...

Oh oh but this is my favorite question: "Macam mana ye kalau di pasar basah yg menjual babi, apa jadi sekiranya lalat yg hinggap di daging babi hinggap pula di daging lembu yg dijual oleh orang melayu? "

Islam says everything is pure until proven impure. What's with the paranoia surrounding our community?

The day Chloe came home

2011-03-03T12:06:00.004+01:00

Chloe came home on January 11, 2011. Shannon gave us her bed, her toy bone and a box of her food for us to take home to ensure that she has something with her smell on it. She was a good baby. Although she refused to stay in her bed, she sat and slept next to me during the ride home. She did not poop nor pee, and was in her best behavior. I did not think she was scared back then, but now that I think about it, I think she did coz she was so quite all the way, which is so unlike her.

Once we arrived, I carried her inside and placed her bed next to our back door so she'll have easy access to the yard. I took out some of her food from the box and placed it in a bowl. Hubby and I were laughing when I took out another small bowl to fill with water - we had to ensure that the bowl was only big enough to fit her face and not her ears. King Charles has quite long ears - with a bigger bowl, she'll be wetting her ears before she even has a sip of her drink and we didn't want that!

The first thing that we wanted to do was to potty train her. We took a piece of newspaper and placed it outside. We encouraged her to go on the newspaper (tough work I tell ya!) and praised her every time she did. But being a 14 weeks old puppy, accidents do happen. In general, puppies are only able to control its bladder when they are at least 20 weeks old. Since Chloe is just a baby, when she has to go, she has to go. After 2 accidents in the house, we decided to puppy proof the house - we took out all the carpets and tried many means such as mopping the floor with vinegar, spraying dog repellent spray on the tile etc. Finally, after approximately a month of staying, Chloe is potty trained! Yeay!

From day 1 itself, we tried to set our rules right. Chloe was not allowed to go upstairs, and has to go to bed at 8.30 p.m. every night. It broke my heart to left her all alone downstairs, after all, she's just a baby. Hubby says I shouldn't feel that way as we need to train her to be independent. The first night at home, Chloe whimpered like a baby coz she was afraid to be alone. The next day, we figured that we should get her some toys as a mean of distraction. We came back from the pet shop with Buddy and Blue and placed them in her bed. We saw her walking to her bed, went inside, laid next to her Buddy and hugged him. It was like nothing I've ever seen before. That night, she slept better, hugging her precious friend.

Chloe hugged Buddy as she laid next to him. Maybe it reminded her of her litter mates :(

See how tiny she is?

Chloe taking an afternoon nap with Blue on our backyard

The day Chloe came into our lives

2011-03-03T11:14:00.003+01:00

We adopted Chloe when she was 14 weeks old. Chloe comes from a family of 7. Her mom, Brandy and dad, Snap are pure breed blenheim Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Both mom and dad are spoilt rotten - they sleep in the bedroom, stays up on the sofa and has access to all areas of the house. I had the shock of my life when I arrived at Shannon's place - she has a door that separates her living room and the front door, and that door was shaking like crazy. I was imagining a toddler banging on the door wanting to go out and see who has arrived but to my surprise, it was Brandy and Snap! Ha ha. As soon as I entered the living room, I saw a tiny baby walking away from the room, her bum moving left and right and my heart skipped a bit.

We sat on the sofa while Shannon went and grabbed Chloe from the room. What can I say, the moment I laid my eyes on her, it was love at first sight. I remember my heart melting when Shannon placed Chloe in my arms, she was just so beautiful and tiny and oh so sweet. While holding Chloe, I saw another baby walking past me - it was her little brother! Shannon said Chloe's brother is unwell, he was the last one that came out and was born with a big head and she was going to 'get rid of him'. My heart sank at her words, and I just wish we have the means to adopt both. He was so beautiful but I know that we would not be able to do justice being new parents ourselves. I hope you are doing well little baby, and I hope you found someone who loves you as much as we love your sister :(

Chloe was born to 5 litter mates. One was adopted by a family from Auckland, while two were bought by a pet shop. To our surprise, we bumped into Chloe's brother in a pet shop in Takapuna a month after we brought Chloe home. We were so sure he was Chloe's brother as he has the same birth date and that tiny pink marking on his nose, just like little Chloe. My heart sank looking at him - there he was, 20 weeks old, sitting in a glass crate for the world to see, waiting for a kind soul to take him home and to love him. I asked the sales girl if he came with another litter mate, just to be sure. She said he did, but the sister has been bought by someone. He's got urine stain all over his feet, and he looked so sad it broke my heart. A puppy his age should not be locked up. Instead, he should be walking and running on parks and beaches and snuggling with someone who loves him. I left the shop, wondering how Chloe would react if she were to see him. Would she have recognized that it was her brother?

Dogs in Islam part 2

2011-03-01T11:58:00.007+01:00

I've been wanting to write about dogs in Islam for so long but failed to do so for many occasions.

Well, in case you guys are wondering - yes, I did study the Quran and Hadith for many months before I adopted Chloe.

My stake on it?

Well, to be honest, the more I studied, the more convinced I am that most Hadith that talked negatively about dogs were fabricated.

Why do I say that?

Firstly, the Quran mentioned dogs many times, and all were in good lights. Al-Ma'idah spoke about using trained dogs for hunting:

"Lawful unto you are things good and pure, and what you have taught your trained hunting animals to catch in the manner directed to you by God. Eat what they catch for you, but pronounce the name of God over it"

Al-Kahf spoke about a dog who accompanied the people of the cave who were true believers:

"...And We turned them on their right and on their left sides, and their dog stretching forth his two forelegs at the entrance..."

"(Some) say they were three, the dog being the fourth among them; (others) say they were five, the dog being the sixth, guessing at the unseen; (yet others) say they were seven, the dog being the eigth"

Secondly, most Hadiths that spoke negatively about dogs are not in line with the teachings of our great prophet, Muhammad s.a.w. Muhammad was very affectionate towards animals, and was against animal cruelty be it physically, or mentally. Once upon a time, one of his companion took two baby chicks away from the mother. When Muhammad s.a.w saw the mother bird hovering on top of them with grief, he straightaway ordered his companion to return the chicks to the mother for it has hurt her feelings. Would the same person ordered the killings of dogs, as stated in some Hadiths?

Thirdly, in my opinion, the most convincing Hadith about the cleansing ritual of dogs is the one narrated by Imam Muslim:

"When a dog has licked a bowl of yours, clean it seven times, first time with earth, the other six with water"

Why do I say this is the most convincing? Well, a scientific research done by a PhD student who studied dogs' saliva found out that harmful virus(es) can only be found when dogs are eating/drinking. At other times, a dog's saliva is free of virus(es). In my opinion, this clearly explains the reason why Muslims are allowed to eat what trained dogs hunt/bite for their master, but are required to wash the container that has been licked by a dog if we were to use it for our own.

Islam is science.

So, how do you keep it simple and hygienic? Easy-peasy, just separate your container from your dog's container!

It is worth mentioning that the first Hadith collections were written 250 years after the death of our great prophet. Stories were circulated by word of mouth for 8 generations before it was written down. Would it be possible that some of the information received were delivered incorrectly? Furthermore, is there a possibility that some Hadiths were biased towards some cultures and beliefs?

Allah knows best.

Meet baby Chloe

2011-03-01T11:55:00.003+01:00

Ain't she a sweetheart?

:D

Sometimes you just have to be cruel

2011-02-28T05:26:00.002+01:00

This is not the one that goes 'You have to be cruel to be kind'.

This is about being cruel to survive this mad, mad world.

I was never in a situation where I had to go out and look for a job, nor was I in a situation where I had to defend my rights and voice out my thoughts to my boss over another employee/student that were being mean to me. Haha macam budak kecik.

Well, there's always a first time right?

Today is a particularly bad day. Maybe I am meant to meet a 'peculiar' person every single semester, be it a tutor, or a student. Yes, 'peculiar' (I refuse to use the word jahat as I am trying to build a positive atmosphere here. Tehee)

Hubby says I am too polite and that's why people bully me. Whenever I wrote a complaint email to my boss, I try to cushion it a bit so that person does not appear so jahat and I don't appear too emotional.

Ijah told me she has stopped being all nice and polite after being in Emirates for sometime. She's realized that people will not stop stepping on you for as long as they think they can. No matter how we try to rationalize the behavior, we couldn't. Some people are just built that way and there's nothing that we can do about it, really.

There's two ways of going about it. One - to be as cruel as them. To always put my needs and my wants first. To do whatever it is takes to get what I want, even if it means having to be cruel or rude to others. Second - to stick to who I am, but to grow bigger than all of them that I become unaffected by what people do or say to me.

Which one would you guys choose?

I know I'd have a hard time choosing the first, not because I don't want to, but because I can't. So, I have no choice but to resort to the latter. I also think I'll be a better person by choosing the latter. I know one person who has no problem being the latter as he has always been that all his life.

Did I told you guys how much I am looking forward to 2011? Well, I am ;)

There's a lot to be hopeful for and I pray to God that all will be smooth sailing. Everything is looking up, and I am loving this positive vibe that I have with me right now and hope this will stay throughout the year, and more.

I hope all of your wishes are granted too, dear friends. God willing.

XoXo, love ya all.

I'm over the moon!

2011-02-26T23:00:00.004+01:00

I'm sooooo happy today!! Weeeeeeee ;D

I've been on high for the last couple of days. If you're wondering why, well, we received an email which changes everything! Now I have so much things to look forward to in 2011 and I thank Allah for all the blessings!

To all my peeps, enjoy the rest of the weekend. I know I will! ;D

2 a.m post

2011-02-09T13:57:00.002+01:00

It's 2 a.m and I am still studying for my exam.

I'm all stressed out and I don't know if I can make it this coming Friday.

I have the option of postponing the exam again but I chose not to because I am sick of studying.

At the same time, I do not want to waste the money that I have spent to sit for it, knowing that I will flunk it big time.

I was googling 'Life of an expat wife' and many articles came up.

Some talked about the frequent nerve wrenching moment of being asked what they do for a living.

Heh, I can totally relate to that.

Adults are define by what they do, not who they are.

You are either a teacher, a banker, an economist, or a nobody.

Dare to disagree?

For others, they spent their time cam whoring, shopping, cooking, and looking after the kids.

I seriously need to stop obsessing over finding a full time job.

Instead, I should start cam whoring too, and show the world what wonderful world I live in, just like they do.

Working part-time, going for baking classes, cooking, lazing around beaches, looking after my pets.

The only thing missing right now is a maid and a personal driver.

Now, do I sound like a bimbo, already?

Fomfuan pemalas takde arah tuju hidup

2011-02-07T23:48:00.004+01:00

Ok so that pretty much sums up what I am feeling right now.

I postponed my exam because apparently 4 days of studying is not enough. So the new date is this coming Friday. Boleh pass ke nie? Cuakkk.

Tgh meroyan sebab tak ske tak ske study IT.

Did I told you guys how much I despises IT subjects?

Did I told you guys the only reason I stayed in the course was because I got scholarships for both my bachelor and masters studies? And also because I love my mates at MMU.

No one should stay or enroll in a course that they loath coz they'll end up like me.

Yes, just like me.

So what do I do now?

Sums up the courage to do what I want to do. Forget about the money coz the money will come when you love doing what you do.

Life is not worth living like this.

Benci CCNA to the max.

I can never be good at this :(

Life

2011-02-07T22:34:00.002+01:00

Hidup ni biar berguna kat orang lain.

Dengar tak??

Hidup ni biar berguna kat orang lain!

Chaiyok!

Mari buat ulangkaji

2011-01-31T11:21:00.002+01:00

Mari buat ulangkaji secara tekun supaya dapat pass exam CCNA dengan flying colors pada hari Kamis ini.

Doakan saya ye kengkawan!

*Yawn*

Update

2011-01-30T01:27:00.006+01:00

Macam malas nak update pasal anjing lagi. Dah tulis separuh tapi tak habis lagi. I'll find time to complete it then I'll post the entry ya folks!

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Latest update:

1. Thanks to my two very good buddies, I finally got accepted by the graduate school at Auckland University. I should start applying for the scholarship now, but my heart is not into it. Boohoo.

2. I failed an interview recently :(. The advertised position was for an IT project management lecturer but when I turned up for the interview, they told me they were looking for a networking lecturer. I was quite confident about acing the interview when I stepped out of the room but later I've realized that I went on and on about my experience in project management instead of networking. It's like my head and mouth were programmed and I was not able to deter my mind to talk about my experience in networking. Rasa bodoh gile ok :(

3. Lepas tau failed interview terus depress gile dan rasa macam nak apply keje kat Nando's je.

4. I've got a new pet. Her name's Chloe. She's like the most adorable pet ever - sweet, smart and petite. Just like me. Ha ha. Will blog about her later.

5. I completed Wilton cake's decoration course 1 last week. Stress makcik tau buat icing, tapi seronok gile hokeh! Habis duit banyak gile sbb beli tools, equipments, and also because I had to bake a cake for every single session. Nasib la makcik keje, tak sampai hati nak mintak duit laki hokeh (gile untung jaha kawen ngan guwe). But it was worth it I tell ya! Check out the photos ;)

It's Chocolate Mud Cake with Ganache

I made those flowers, can you believe it?!

Chocolate chip cupcakes

Flowers, bear heads and roses ;)

A birthday cake for Salwa's 7th birthday. You're an oldie baby!

Choc cake, again ;)

Salwa sniffing her cake. Kena paksa okeh. Kucing kurang cerdik tatau org buat kek utk dia :(

Baiklah tuan-tuan dan puan-puan, cita-cita saya mulai sekarang ialah untuk menjadi seorang baker ye!

Adios for now!

Dogs in Islam

2011-01-09T12:09:00.004+01:00

I wasn't a dog person. Once, in Madrid, I shifted house the very first day I arrived because the landlord has got a yorkshire terrier. I did not know about it initially because I was communicating with her via email while I was in Greece and it never occurred to me to ask if she has got a canine friend.

Anyway, I remember that my parents were there with me and the moment that lady opened the door, the dog (Ricky) came jumping on me. My mom and dad wasn't happy about it and they've asked me to talk nicely to the lady and asked if it would be OK to not live there. Thank god she was cool about it, and the best part was that, I've got a friend who volunteered to stay there to replace me, so, problem solved!

There's a bunch of yorkshire terrier in Madrid. It's like the most common household pet. I was not fond of them because the thought of having to samak (the act of cleaning 7 times, one with earth) really turned me off. I usually try to avoid having any contact with them, though I tried my best to not look as if I was running away from them. Don't want people to start thinking that Muslims are dog haters. My mom, whenever encountered with a dog, would happily take a detour sampai badan senget2 haha.

I never really studied them or put any interest because as far as I know, Islam forbids us to touch dogs. There's lots of different opinions. Some say you can't touch them at all, some say you can touch them when they're dry, some say you can touch them when they're wet (but you have to be wet as well), while some say you only have to samak if you touch their saliva. There were so many opinions from different ulama's and I just thought hey, I better take the safest way by avoiding them at all cost.

I remember one time when I was in Helkidiki, Greece travelling with Bou and Mike. We saw a tiny baby yorkshire terrier by the road. She was probably lost or were left there by her owner, which was really a sad thing because she was the size of my palm. I remember I had this really strong urge to touch her to comfort her but of course I did not do so, fearing that I had to samak. Come to think of it, what's so difficult about that? I wish I had done so because she was so happy rolling about when Bou touched her. I wish I had studied more about Islam and dogs when I was there but unfortunately out of my ignorance and I guess stubbornness (thinking that I had sufficient knowledge about the hukum already) , I did not.

I remember being in awe when I see people with their dogs. Ricky, for example, has got his photos all over the house. One time, the owner travelled to New York and brought Ricky with her all the way. His ticket was the same price with hers (or probably more, can't remember). What a person would do for a dog!

My perception about dogs changed after I got married. Hubby loves all animals, including dogs. Whenever we encountered dogs, he would pat them on the head and rub their body. He always talks about how intelligent dogs are, and how they are truly men's best friend. He often talks about the benefits of having dogs as pets - how they enrich our lives due to their loyalty and increase our health. Do you guys know that very few dog owners ever had heart attacks? Dogs are so therapeutic that some hospitals are using them in their wards to ease patients, while some schools are using them to help kids learn how to read. Not to mention, guide dogs that are used to help the blinds. Pretty amazing, don't you think?

I was at first quite skeptical about my husband touching dogs, and I questioned him a lot about this. He told me it's OK, dogs are not dirty, they are one of god's wonderful creatures that are brought forward on earth to assist us humans. But I was in doubt because my husband, being a person that he is, has his own mind about a whole lot of stuff. For example, he thinks it's all right to jamak our prayers if we do not have time due to work commitment for example, and it is OK for him to touch me after he takes his wudhu', as long as it does not involve sexual desires. Those were pretty hard to sink in because as far as I'm concerned, we are only allowed to jamak if we are a musafir, that is, if we are travelling more than 90 kilometers. As far as touching me after taking his wudhu', it doesn't make any sense at all because it contradicts what I have been taught since I was a little girl. He keeps telling me to think more logically and to use my brain instead of taking whatever it is that is being taught by my ustazs/ustazahs. He told me to put things in contexts and not restrain myself with what is being said by the ulama' because being human, they might be wrong after all. Ho told me to try to picture the prophet and imagine what he would do or say being in the same situation. He told me to read not just the Quran, but the Bible to understand things thoroughly instead of listening and following what other people were saying.

Funny that after some research, I found out that yes, what he said was all true. You may jamak if you have time constraint which has been agreed by all ulama' worldwide, and yes, Malaysian's ulama' has recently agreed (last year if I am not mistaken) that if you touch your husband/wife after you've taken your wudhu', your wudhu' would still be intact.

One thing I learned when I was in Spain was that history is what people want you to believe. History may or may not be true, it all depends on the person who told the story. Why do I say that? Long story, all boils down to my interest back then of finding out about Franco, the ruler who shaped Spain's history. Senang cite macam ni la, contohnya, if you support BN, you'd say all good things about them and you'd trash PAS, DAP and PKR right? But, if you support the so-called people's coalition, it'd be the other way round, betul tak? But which one is the villain? BN or Pakatan Rakyat? Well, it would very much depend on which sides you are on, right? Get what I mean?

Now, what has that got to do with my story? Punya panjang lebar bercerita hehe. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've learned something valuable here too, after I got married. That is, to never easily judge people and think bad of them just because they don't do things similar to how you do it or how the rest of the world do it. Who knows, that person may have more intelligence and sense than the rest of us, combined.

To be continued...

Baby

2011-01-06T03:39:00.003+01:00

People have been asking me if I'm pregnant.

What's with being married and pregnancy? It's like everybody expects you to have a bun in the oven right after your marriage.

I don't tell everyone that I was planning for the whole year.

Simply coz I think Malay people just don't get it.

I can imagine the expression on their face if I do tell them.

"What? Why do you do that? Do you know that if you plan you might not get one? It's better not to plan the first one, you know!"

Yes, that is exactly the kind of comment that people would give if I do tell them that I am planning to NOT have a baby, yet.

Why do I plan?

Simply coz I need to get something done first. Only a few good friends know what 'that' thing is ;)

In the end, it's going to be for the baby. Or rather, babies ;)

I am comfortable with just being the two of us, though sometimes I envy those with kids.

But at the same time, I also have this urge to stay this way so I can travel to Argentina and Peru. (Eh plan apa plak ni? Haha)

Isn't that kind of selfish?

Will I be fit to be a mom if I'm selfish?

But then again, it has always been a dilemma for a woman, kan?

Sebelum kawen orang tanya bila nak kawen. Bila dah kawen orang tanya bila nak ada anak. Bila dah ada anak orang tanya bila nak tambah anak.

Never ending story, kan?

Jadi kesimpulannya, to hell with what people say. Live your life coz it looks like they don't (sbb tu sempat jaga tepi kain orang haha)

I just wish that when we are both ready to start trying, Allah akan permudahkan jalan dan memberi rezki yang terbaik untuk kami berdua.

Amin.

Hari merapu sedunia

2011-01-06T01:25:00.009+01:00

Hari ni nak merapu macam-macam sebab bosan takde arah hidup.

So anyway I am writing this while making lunch. It's gonna be mushroom with salmon spiral pasta (coz I'm out of the normal pasta). The recipe? Senang aje.

Dice half an onion

Slice 8 fresh mushrooms

Slice some salmon (patut guna tuna tapi takde)

Fresh milk + Margarine (coz I don't have cream and coz butter has got more fat than margerine)

Sautee the onion till yellow. Masukkan sliced mushrooms and again, sautee till the color darkens. Then, masukkan sliced salmon. Lps tu masukkan susu (arghhhh fresh milk dah habis terpaksa substitute dgn susu soya. Apsal seme bende takdek dlm fridge ni???). Masukkan a tablespoon of margerine.

Finally, season with salt and pepper.

I have no idea how this is going to turn out coz I'm just kinda using whatever that is available in the fridge (Soy milk??????)

Eh eh lupa letak chicken stock. OK girls, a dash of chicken stock ok?!

Lps ni sy akan bgtau verdict sedap ke tak. ngeh ngeh. Gosh harunya tukang masak.

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On another note, mari kita listkan resolutions pada tahun ini...

Malas lah.

Simply coz I never stick to it and it goes out the window on the very first day itself.

Mari kita tengok pencapaian resolutions tahun lps:

1. Learn spanish - nada

2. Learn how to read notes and play keyboard - I can read notes and play simple child songs. I'm too lazy when it comes to practicing, and sticking to one thing for a long time.

3. Start a Permanent head Damage - I prepared a 4 page proposal and managed to get 2 kind soul to supervise my work. I was struggling to get referees as they specifically wanted academic referees, plus I was kinda lazy too haha. Last2 mintak tlg 2 org sahabat yg baik hati, so hopefully by end of this month dapat green light. It took me 6 whole months nak carik referees, pemalas ke tak?

4. A good scholarship - tak start pon lagi. The last doctoral scholarship for the school ended last december. Eh apsal pemalas sgt nie???

5. A part time job - I only wanted something simple which doesn't use much of my brain contohnya waitress ke, salesgirl ke. Sbb konon nak buat #4 above kan? Last2 dpt jadik tutor ajar bdk diploma sbb takde orang nak amik muka nie jadik salesgirl haha. Enjoying the teaching part tremendously but hating my work mates. Gaji per hour pon best. Alhamdulillah.

6. Brush up on swimming and play more sports - I can swim a good distance nowadays and have confidence keeping afloat while standing, which I was struggling to do for many, many years. Lepas ni nak practice free style plak sampai terer! I am also training for tennis (thank you mr husband for being patient with me).

7. Lose 6 kg for good - Hari tu dah kurusssss dahhhhh. 47 kg you. Pastu sbb dah kurus makan mentakedarah lupa diri pastu gemok balik. Hello 50 kg.

8. Cut down on sugar, carb and fat. Eat more greens and 5 servings of fruits per day - As I've said, hari tu dah kurus, tapi sekarang gemok blk. Need I say more? But then again, I do take more fruits and greens nowadays thanks to my husband yang suka paksa saya makan.

9. Drink lotsa water - this one is the hardest to do sbb tak pernah rasa dahaga. How ah?

10. Read, listen and watch more - I definitely watch more documentaries and good movies nowadays as we subscribed to Fatso, so I can get any kind of movie, as much as I want, unlimited. I'm still struggling to keep the reading momentum on. I am more selective on what I read nowadays, the only problem is I never actually finish them. I really want to re-live the enjoyment of reading a good book like how I used to when I was in school. I can read all night long with a torch in my hand sebab takut mak nampak tak tido2 sbb esok nak sekolah haha. And I can read something that I like over and over again. I think I've read The Client by John Grisham 6 kali kot. I want to re-live the passion for reading again coz it's good to enjoy something and to be smart!

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Saya baru dpt tahu yg Stephen Fry adalah seorang gay. Not that I have anything against gays.

p/s: By the way, Elton John dah dapat baby. Surrogate rasanya. I think it's sick and irresponsible. It's still ok for 2 consulting men to get married but to adopt a child? Come on, have some mercy on the kid! Tak ke budak tu confuse nanti pasal family institution?

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I've just booked Milly's Kitchen baking class. Ye, saya dah bertukar menjadi seorang yang rajin memasak selepas kahwin kah kah. Funny aye how your status changes you. Ops Sex and the City cakap tak elok cakap psl status or label - single/married/divorcee coz in the end, you are what you are. I totally second that.

I am also planning to enroll in Wilton Basic Cake Decoration. It's super cheap, going for NZD 130 for 4 x 2 hours session. Kat Malaysia RM 780 hokeh! Jadi bila blk Malaysia saya nak jadik cake decorator dan baker and jugak instructor. Boleh?

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I am still struggling with my career. Bukan struggle carik kerja, tapi struggle nak kerja apa. Haha. To be honest I stoppped looking for a job ever since I started teaching. I better start looking seriously now that new year has come.

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Ok la people. That's too much rambling already for today. Till next time. Love ya!

Tim

2010-12-31T10:28:00.007+01:00

We had a quite dinner with Tim today. Tim was our neighbor at Carolina Place and now that we've shifted, we invited him over to our place. There's something about Tim that just gets to us. He lives by himself, he doesn't talk much and he's always alone. Tim lost his job a while ago so he's always at home. He lives on the second floor and he likes to lay down flat in front of his door. Sometimes I see him walking to the pump station to get a bottle of milk, doesn't look like he eats much. Sometimes I see him taking a shower at the pool club, maybe coz it's free and it saves him from paying the heating bill. It does get pretty costly during winter over here. One day he dropped by to ask for hubby's help to carry a TV he found at the dumpster, too bad it was broken when they tested it. That was the day we knew he hasn't even got a TV at home.

The next day, hubby bought a TV. He did not told Tim it was from him, he said it was from a friend who wanted to get rid of it. Tim was over the moon when he saw pictures coming on the TV. He was so happy and he was going on and on about it for a couple of weeks. Such a sweet guy he is. I asked hubby what's inside his house. I did not mean to be nosey, I just wanted to know how he lives and if he was living OK. Has he got a bed? Does it look like he's cooking and eating well? Hubby says his bedroom is empty accept for a chair, he's got a couple of sofa in his living room and his kitchen looked unused, except for a couple of tea bags that was lying around on his kitchen bench.

That night hubby told me something that reminded me of why I fell in love with him in the first place. He said 'Berdosa kita membiarkan jiran kita lapar sedangkan kita tahu dia dalam kesusahan'. The next day, we invited him for dinner.

The first time he came over he did not even eat much. I know lots of people who would stuff as much food as they can just coz it's free. But Tim was not like that. He took whatever he wanted, which was not much by the way. He even declined dessert just coz he's shy and polite. He did not talk much, and he wanted to go back as soon as he's done.

Today, he's much more relaxed. He talked a lot, he was not rushing to get back home, and it felt like he was truly enjoying it.

Tim reminded me to be thankful for all the things that I have. For the roof on top of my head, the food on the table and the ride that gets me places.

Thank you God for all the rezqi yang Engkau limpahkan kepada kami. Amin.

Turkish bread

2010-11-25T10:00:00.002+01:00

I am posting this recipe to record a simple Turkish bread recipe that I found online. I tried making this today but has mistakenly put more water than I should. Still, the bread turned out pretty good except that I couldn't make indents as the dough was pretty sticky. Better luck next time!

Turkish Bread
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Mix all the ingredients and place in the bread maker:

350ml Water
1/3 cup olive oil
4 cups Plain Flour
1/2 tsp Salt
1/2 tsp Sugar
1 1/2 tsp Yeast (soak in warm water for 15 minutes before mixing)

Set your machine off making your dough. Mine takes 1.25 hours in the machine on dough setting.

Then divide it into three balls and roll each out into a rectangle 35cm x 15cm. Make indents in the bread using your knuckles. Wash with an egg wash (1 egg and 2 tsp water beaten together) and sprinkle with sesame seeds or nigella seeds. Set aside in a warm place to rise for 20 minutes.

Bake each on a lightly greased tray at 220 degrees Celsius or 10 - 12 minutes

Ngeng...ngeng...ngeng macam nyamuk

2010-10-06T06:55:00.004+02:00

I teach part-time so I go crazy the rest of the hours when I am not. Salwa keeps me insane during those hours, thank god for that. I talk to her in kitty voice coz she's a cat but my husband says I shouldn't coz it drives him crazy. For god's sake, she is the only amusement that I have when I am at home, alone. Sometimes I pretend as if I am her mommy and she is my little baby girl.

Gosh those free hours really do make me go insane.

Teaching is tiring. A session of lecture or lab really worked me up. I'd usually slump myself on the sofa when I get back home, try hard not to sleep but would end up snoozing for at least an hour. I have no complaint for that. It's OK, because teaching is never boring, it's always engaging.

So at least that confirms the fact that I am not lazy. I used to think that I was a lazy bum coz I used to drag myself to work everyday. But that was different - that was working behind a desk 8 hours a day pretending to be busy, or sitting in a meeting pretending as if I cared. There's no such thing here, accept for pretending to be smart when you are bombarded with questions that you are clueless about.

Hubby is encouraging me to get an IT job coz it's more promising. My heart sinks at the thought of it and I just wish I'd never have to go back to office work. But I do know that sitting around playing with my cat will not do me any good. If only I can get a full time teaching schedule, that would be awesome.

On another note, my cat has some sort of a yo-yo diet going on. One day she's fat, another day she's slim like a model. She loves sitting on top of me as if she's light like feather. I have never actually weigh her, bet she's at least 2.5 kilos. I sleep on the left side of the bed, and so does she. She sleeps right next to me every single night, always aiming for my left arm *cough* pit *cough*. Whenever I sleep on my tummy, she gets confuse coz it means my left hand is in the middle of the bed and she doesn't like that.

Silly cat.

I think she's bright for a cat. If only there's an IQ tests going on among cats I think she'd easily ace it. Oh, and she can act too. For example, she likes to greet me whenever I get home. I can usually hear her running from the room towards the door, but the moment I open the door she'd sit still or stretch herself, pretending as if she doesn't care. I wonder who taught her that, or why she is acting that way.

I have lots to tell about Salwa, but I won't bore you non-cat lovers about my silly cat's tales.

Signing off for now, with love.

This is a hate post

2010-09-30T06:52:00.005+02:00

I hate one person at my work. And because of him, I am starting to hate his whole race.

I know it's a strong statement, but I've had enough of them. I don't remember them having so much hatred in their heart while we were in school. There were a number of them in my class, and we never had any problem getting along. Probably because we grew up in a small town, probably because we were still naive.

Things started to look bad when I was in the UK. I remember helping out 2 fellow classmates in the first semester. I have nothing against them, in fact I was more than happy to help my fellow countryman even though we were off different race. However, when it was my turn to seek for their help, I received so many excuses from both of them and at that time, I understood. People from their race will only use people from my race for their benefit, but will never help you in return. It's like a rooted kind of hatred that was built the very day they were born. Hate the Malays, do whatever it takes to make their lives miserable, even if they do you no harm. They stole our rights, they took what was ours, so let's team up and go against them though we live side by side. Make them believe you, put on you best smiley face, and then stab them when they are not looking.

Who stole who, may I ask?

I used to be a believer in the people's coalition. I used to have high respect for one of their leaders. I thought he was smart, articulate and fair. I saw it all crumbling down after 2008 GE. He was not smart nor articulate, he was cunning. He was everything but fair. He did not want justice for everyone, he wanted justice for his own race. Everything was about his race.

I have never been so proud to be a Malay. Malays may not be the strongest nor the bravest, but we are the most compassionate. Of course we have our downsides too (who doesn't?), but it is trivial. We are good hearted naturally, we were brought up to see the good in people and to forgive / forget people's wrongdoings. We are all human, and human makes mistake. Sometimes we do compete, but unlike them, it's never poisonous.

Glad to get it out of my system.

Told ya it was a hate post.

Is this the one?

2010-08-27T13:09:00.006+02:00

Jakson has been here for the last 7 years. He is originally from Brazil, and came to New Zealand for a brighter future. He did not know much English when he first came, so I assume he took whatever job he could in order to survive, and to help pay for his sister's university fees back in Brazil. He knew that the only way to improve his career was to master the language, so he took several short English courses along the way as he could not afford to go to school full time. After 7 years of hard work, he decided it was time to improve his skills so he quit his job and enrolled for the programme. He strongly believes that there is time for everything, you just have to be patient and you will get there eventually, one step at a time. He thank god for the opportunity for tertiary education as it never crossed his mind before, probably due to his hardship. He knows everyone in the school as he loves communicating. He was the first person who thanked me for teaching him and that made me smile the whole day ;)

Ricky was born in HK, but grew up in New Zealand. He went back to HK after his primary years, if I am not mistaken. He came back earlier this year to pursue his tertiary education as he is an NZ citizen. He says his English is rather rusty as he did not use much while he was back in HK as he was working in a restaurant - waiting tables, I assumed. Like most Chinese, he is very competitive. He strives to be the best and he worries too much about how he is performing in school. Yesterday for example, he asked me whether he has failed his first assignment after I commented on his group's presentation. I tried to comfort him but deep inside what I felt was auwwwww he he. He's just too cute to worry about something like that in the first semester!

Bhavan is the only girl who says hi to me in the morning. Other girls are still pretty shy to even greet me, let alone ask questions in class. She too, came to NZ 3 years ago to pursue her tertiary education. She studied for a while and left school after a year as she was unsure about what she really wanted to do. She told me it was very difficult to find a good job and ended up working in a supermarket for a whole year before deciding to come back to school and finished her diploma.

I don't know much about Jagdeep and Fernando, all I can say is that they are good students. They are both confident and aren't afraid to speak up. As for the others, I hope to find a way to connect to them too.

I have a new profound respect for them. They are motivated, they take time to really ponder about what they want in life, and they do it with a smile.

For me, there are tons to learn in this new field. I worry lots. I worry about them not getting it, I worry about going too slow or too fast, I worry when I go blank while presenting. Ha ha. I hope I can learn as much from them as they can from me. I thank god for this opportunity - an opportunity to see if I can really make it in this field, an opportunity to see if this is what I am looking for all these while.

A clue on how to pursue your dream career

2010-07-23T16:11:00.001+02:00

If you suddenly won the lottery and had all the money you would ever need for a secure and comfortable life, what would you do?

It's funny how things turn out sometimes

2010-07-22T13:20:00.005+02:00

You can be so certain about something but in the end, it could turn out to be a total opposite of what you expected. And you can be so unsure about another, without knowing that you actually nailed it big time.

But that's life aye? If everything is so sure than life would be one boring, straightforward journey. Like the saying goes, the only certain thing is uncertainty.

This time around, it's regarding my permanent head damage application. Like I said before, I was so certain that I nailed Massey, but turns out the guy wouldn't sign the paper until I can proof to him that I can get the participants sorted out. Boohoo. As to Auckland Uni, I was given the green light to proceed with the formal application after the meeting with Dr G and Dr K. And I thought I was blabbing away during the meeting. Funny aye?

Whatever it is, it is still a long way to go. I am not sure whether this is the right path for me - my heart is telling me it's not. Hmmm. I am only doing this to kill some time. I'll give it a thought when the time comes!

The waiting game

2010-07-01T06:42:00.003+02:00

The waiting game is daunting but at times, can be good for the soul. It gives me hope and keeps me going, though I must admit that at times, it drives me crazy too.

But what is life without hope and uncertainties?

Lots of stuff have been going on lately. I have a lot at hand at the moment and it's only a matter of time before I get them realized, Insyallah.

Yesterday was kind of an important day for me. I was supposed to meet both Dr G and Dr K last week on the 24th, but failed to turn up coz I got the days mixed up. I guess that's what happened when you're unemployed, you lose track of time, or days. Boo hoo. Nevertheless, they were both very kind, as all Kiwis are, and scheduled another meeting yesterday at Symonds's instead of at Epsom's. It somehow felt like an interview, a rather bad one. Ha ha. Some of my answers were too short, while some were rather winding. I did not know why I was nervous. Anyway, both of them are supposed to provide me with some answers before the end of this week. I am not quite worried as I think I've pretty much nailed Massey if I fail to get this one.

On another note, I am looking forward with the second round of interview with M*** sometime next month. It's pretty hard to get an interview with a foreign name and I am crossing my fingers for more opportunities to come. I know many are in deeper trouble than I am when it comes to career and moolah, so there are lots to be thankful for even in this situation. I should probably do some certifications while time permits as this might improve my chances for landing a good job.

I have rather good news with regards to my medical condition. My iron level has gone up to its normal range based on my blood test two days ago. My hemoglobin however, is still low despite the improvement in my iron level . That explains my fatigue and forgetfulness. The doctor has prescribed me with more iron tablet and I do hope with God's will that by October, all will be back to normal.

I am looking forward for a weekend getaway with FRW and A's family. 2nd July 2010 will mark our 6 months anniversary and we are celebrating it in Matakana, a small winery town north of Auckland with a few good friends, just how we like it. I was surprised to know that hubby planned the getaway in commemoration of our anniversary as I have only recently remember. He can be quite a romantic at times ;)

I am officially 6 months old wifey tomorrow, how time flies!

Puan Seri

2010-06-21T13:22:00.004+02:00

Somebody pointed out today that I am a Puan Seri.

In what way may you ask?

We were in the middle of a conversation with some acquaintances. Hubby was telling how happy he was that he managed to sell our second car at a reasonably good price.

Then the acquaintance asked,

"Kereta lagi satu?"

I told him no, we are keeping that one.

And he said,

"Yang tu mana boleh jual, tu kan kereta Pn Seri. Hahahaha..."

I know some people around here have the impression that hubby bought that car for me. And when I say people, I meant the Malays. It is rather luxurious for their standard, so they made assumption that I 'requested' for it, for my personal use after we got married.

Truth is hubby's had it with him for several years already. The only reason that people hasn't been noticing is because he prefers to drive the other car, an old 2-seater because it has an open roof top - he likes having the wind in his face. After we got married, he obviously continues to drive that car simply coz he loves it and the fact that as a husband, he wanted me to have the better ride - no rocket science there. So when people see me driving a more luxurious car, they made assumptions that I am a queen who wanted nothing less than a German ride.

Sometimes it boggles me, don't they have enough on their shoulders? Between managing families and pursuing their PhDs, they still have time to jaga tepi kain orang.

Good friends are hard to come by

2010-06-15T02:24:00.005+02:00

Friends are those precious angels who stick by you through thick and thin. They lift you up when you are feeling low. They laugh at your silliness but never ridicule you. They listen to your insecurities and thoughts but never judge you. Acquaintances are abundance, but friends? They are hard to come by.

Yesterday I met someone with a quality of a friend. She's married too, and oh - jobless like me! So that's one thing in common. Ha ha. She is a qualified industrial designer but fails to secure any job due the niche market and her unwillingness to resort to generic art simply due to her passion in what she does.

There was one particular gesture yesterday that made me feel an immediate connection with her. We were talking about traveling and she mentioned how different things are after marriage as she has to consult her husband first. "You know how it is Cikitita, we have responsibilities now..." while rolling her eyes. Ha ha!

Some of you might get the wrong idea and think she is being disrespectful. But if any of you were there yesterday, you would have realized what a nice and cultured person she really is. To me, what she said signifies individuality, and determination of being her own person despite being married to a man. For those who have crossed the marriage-dom, you'd know what I mean. It is easy to lose yourself as you strive to be the perfect wife, especially in our culture.

I loathe ladies who are so clingy to their men. I loathe ladies who stop seeing their friends just to make herself available to her men 24x7. I loathe those who are full of jealousy. I know a person who did not let her husband do manicure because she was uncomfortable with the idea of another woman touching him (read: his fingers).

K I L L M E N O W .

On another note, I was out with another person today. It is sometimes difficult to understand someone and it is hard to categorize them as a friend or an acquitance. I know there are possibilities of her 'using' me, but I am giving her the benefit of the doubt, at least for another month. I shall not blog about it as I do not intend to ruin the positivity that I am having right now.

Till then, signing off with love.

Now I can put on my smiley face

2010-06-07T14:21:00.003+02:00

My last post was on the 3rd of March. I thought of writing from time to time but nothing came to mind. So today while going through the blog I thought hey, why not publish some unfinished post just for the sake of it? So I did.

While browsing through the list, I came across a particular entry that I wrote prior to the wedding. A 'cold feet' entry. All brides get this, I know I did based on what I wrote that day. But boy, am I glad that I married him ;)

Ok enough mushiness.

And enough of whining too.

So for a change, I would like to share with you a few good news. Firstly, I am glad to announce that I have gotten the work visa which is up to the 18th of November. A short duration, but enough to get the residency application done, or so I hope. I have completed the expression of interest, lost 50 marks due to MMU not being recognized by the NZ government, hence eliminated me from the 'auto-approved' group. I refuse to get it assessed by NZQA as I see no point in giving away 750 NZD for recognition purposes so people, do pray for me!

I do have two other good news to share, but both are on initial stage so I thought I'd give it a pass, at least for now. Will definitely share it with you guys once all is confirmed. Good things are definitely coming my way, and I thank Allah and my lucky star (read: darling hubby) for giving me hope when all seems dark and gloomy.

Did I told you guys that I am loving the weather? It has been raining cats and dogs for the past two weeks but I doesn't bother me, really. Auckland has mild temperature, no winter, and half of the time it feels like summer. I know things will only get better, and no matter how bad it gets I know it is a lot better than other places. You'd say that too if you've experienced the hot, humid weather in Malaysia and the crazy four-season-in-a-day in the UK. The weather reminds me of Madrid too, gosh how I miss those carefree days!

It's about...

2010-05-24T11:22:00.004+02:00

...why vs what

...research vs intelligent gathering

...finding the right question

...finding what you don't know

...originality

If this is the best path for me, then I pray to God to ease the way.

Amin.

It's been a while...

2010-04-08T12:41:00.004+02:00

It's been a while since I wrote. Not much has been happening hence, the silence.

The visa application is still pending - my full medical certificate has been been returned to the Auckland office 2 days ago after being sent to the advisee for further examination. I foresee that the result will come out anytime soon, hopefully in a week or two. I am due to depart this country tomorrow at 12.50pm NZ time after the 3 months stay but I shall not due to the absence of my passport. The process of deferring the return ticket has been nerve-wrecking, not due to the complex procedure but due to the absurdity of Malaysia Airlines' call centre which seems to be lacking staff and training, albeit it's reputation. I spent 3 hours on the phone and Internet on our holiday at Lake Tekapo and missed the sunset due to the incompetency of the travel agent, not to mention the hefty amount on the next bill due to the direct call. And the outcome? A headache of going back and forth of whether my ticket was valid for 3 months or a year, and an addition of NZD 550 which is pretty much like buying a whole new ticket on sale.

The verdict?

Screw the ticket, screw the agent.

Meroyan

2010-03-03T10:05:00.011+01:00

I like to think of what I would love to do for a living whenever I'm on my own. It's like an addiction for the past 6 years. Somehow I kept having this vision of being surrounded by kids. Kids ranging from 3 - 12 years old. Kids 3-5 years especially. It feels cheesy to dream about becoming a teacher. Nobody in the X-generation dream of becoming a teacher coz it's just not cool. And to be involved with kids? Lotsa kids? Or is it the biological clock knocking?

Instead of doing the permanent head damage I am now thinking of doing a graduate diploma for a year so I can become a registered teacher. The truth is that I am not keen on this permanent head damage thingy no matter how much I tell myself that it'll do good to my resume and career path. When you really think about it, it doesn't really makes sense to be doing something that you don't love, does it? Why would I wanna torture myself into doing something that I loathe just coz it sounds good on paper? But if I do take that path, what would happen when I get back? Would it be valid for me to teach back home? What would the pay be like? Would I have to start from the beginning like fresh graduates do? There's a huge possibility there, I think. But if I can't than do I have to start looking for office jobs again coz I know I'd hate to do that. I guess if I were to go home anytime soon than the best path is to stick to the initial plan, but that wouldn't make me happy in the long run, would it?

And it makes it a lot harder with the fact that I'm beginning to like this place and having thoughts of making it home. Low crime rate, low traffic, less stress, more quality time - perfect place to raise a family. But that would break mom's heart. Period. It's a battle between doing something that you want and doing something that your love ones want and it drives me crazy whenever I think about it.

I once dreamt of running a small cafe with wooden interiors all over. Wooden chairs, wooden table, wooden counter top, wooden shelves and wooden everything. Yellow lighting. That would go well with my wooden floor. And I'd serve people good quality food which I cook from my heart. Yeah yeah laugh your heart out ;p When I was in Reading I used to help out a friend who owns a cafe a couple of times and guess what, I changed my mind after doing that. Just like that. Poofff. It doesn't work like what I had in mind. It was waking up at 6 in the morning to open at 11 and going back at midnight when it closes at 6. And that wasn't even a proper cafe with in-house dining, it was a take-away cafe which serves food from the freezer. What if the same thing happen this time around? What if I spend a year in graduate school, and spend all the moolah, and end up not liking the job?

When I started working I used to have this particular question running in my head. I kept thinking about the purpose of life and it drove me crazy every single time. I had a decent job, a decent pay, fabulous friends and I was seeing someone. I was not bad for a 22 year old yet felt something was missing. It felt wrong to be getting up in the morning day in day out, dragging yourself to work, come back home, watch telly and doze off - the cycle continues. Is that it? Is that life? Have I got nothing to offer apart from spending and doing everything for myself? I think I used to drive my friends crazy whenever I brought this up coz to them life was OK, not fabulous but OK and they just don't get where I come from and why I felt that way. And I don't get how they can be so content with what they do and have. I wanted to travel, I wanted to see the world but there was not much to spare. I thought that maybe, just maybe if I get to see more of the world I'd finally get the idea of what I really want in life. And there comes the scholarship and it was like a dream come true. I get to see more of the world but it left me for longing for more.

Maybe I am spoilt in a way that I want everything, and the fact that I need to have all the parts working. Partner wise, family wise, friends and career. I don't see how people can be content having just one. I disagree with the way some people stay away from their friends and what they love doing when they settle down. Having a partner completes you, I agree. But I believe that you still need to have the other 3 to be completely happy and content. I see many women crumbling down when they have issues with their partner coz they just don't see their lives in portions. And the fact that they don't have the other portions working because they are so into the relationship they would just simply abandoned everything else and work on the one portion that they think matters the most. I crumbled once too, I believe everyone has at one point or another, else you didn't do much living or had much love. But I try not to sabotage the other 3 portions that makes life beautiful.

When I was a lot younger I thought I'd had it all figure out by this time but nope, that didn't happen. Bohooo. But I do know that I have a lot to be thankful for. I don't know what got into me to be thinking of this right now, probably the fact that I have too much time to kill. It drives me crazy to not having to work and I'd never thought that I'd feel this way coz I loathe my previous job and I hated the rat race. Period.

I hope one fine day I'll find what it is that I love doing so I can say to myself that hey! this is it! this is me doing what I love to do, day in day out coz you know what - life is short and it's not worth wasting it at something you loathe.

Sometimes when I cook, I weep

2010-03-02T21:20:00.007+01:00

That was by far the stupidest script I've ever heard for a cheese commercial on the idiot box. And to team it up with a gorgeous Italian man who speaks thick Italian accent (drool heheh) while cooking pasta in his spotless kitchen was actually bluwekkkk (and I thought Greek TV shows were the worst! ;p)

Went for some groceries last night at Pakn'Save after the better half finished his badminton session and whaddaya know, the flat peach has finally made it's way in town and got themselves on the counter and here it's known as Peaches Flatto. Go figure heheh. I've been trying to tell him about this peach ever since we got here. That got me reminded a lot about Madrid and the fun times that I had coz that was the exact place where I first saw this particular fruit. It looks ugly as compared to the normal peach but like what my mom always say, the hideous it looks, the better it tastes. I wonder if that applies to people too. In the sense that the more hideous they look, the better they are? I know some who look hideous and act like one too. Huh!

Did I ever told you people that I got a Salvatore Ferragamo purse as a wedding gift from his cousin? I mean, who the heck would ever give you a Ferragamo on your wedding day???? Or any day for that matter??? Another mind boggling gift was from his aunt - a gold bracelet. Like what the??? Who the heck would give you gold apart from your parents???? That still gives me chill on my spine whenever I think about it! I got some cool ones from my parents too - that hotel room and the flight tickets to Queenstown for our honeymoon. And it's cool that I got that givenchy perfume, lingeries and a diffuser to go with it muehehe. Thanks NI, NA, RM, SS and NNK!!

Nothing much has been going on. The work permit has been sent off yesterday at Queen's street, let's see how that one goes. The permanent head damage application has been lodged. We'll see how that one goes too. We went for movies in the park at Greenhithe the other day to watch Fame and it's funny coz we thought we had it over the top with our pillows and sheets and foodies but when we got there, we haven't got much as compared to others with their bean bags and nice chairs and sleeping bags and lots more! Another month to go and I'm loving it! The next would be Transformers 2 at I-can't-remember-where. Anyway, what I really wanted to point out is a quote from that movie which goes something like this...

"Happiness is waking up in the morning knowing that you're doing something you love and going to bed at night feeling that you've done your very best at it"

Cool aye?

When will I land a job that makes me happy? Will I ever figure it out?

Sebagai peringatan

2010-02-24T07:25:00.009+01:00

1. Memberi/membuat segelas air untuk suami -> mendapat pahala puasa sunat 1 tahun.

2. Menyedia/memasak makanan yang mengenyangkan suami -> mendapat pahala haji dan umrah.

3. Menguli tepung gandum dengan bismillah -> Allah akan berkatkan rezeki.

4. Menyapu lantai dengan berzikir -> mendapat pahala seperti meyapu lantai di Baitullah.

5. Melayani dengan baik suami yang pulang ke rumah di dalam keadaan letih -> mendapat pahala jihad.

6. Menjaga solat, puasa, menutup aurat serta taat pada suami selagi suami tidak melanggar syara’ -> diizinkan Allah memasuki syurga dari mana2 pintu.

7. Melayan suami tanpa khianat -> mendapat pahala 12 tahun solat.

8. Mengurut suami tanpa di suruh -> mendapat pahala 7 lapis emas.

9. Mengurut suami setelah disuruh -> mendapat pahala 7 lapis perak.

10. Memandang suami dengan penuh kasih sayang -> dipandang Allah dengan pandangan rahmat.

11. Melayani suami dengan baik dalam keadaan suami marah -> mendapat pahala separuh jihad.

12. Menghamilkan benih suami -> mendapat pahala syahid.

13. Mandi Junub dengan suami -> mendapat pahala seperti bersedekah 1000 ekor kambing pada fakir miskin.

14. Redha suami keluar berjuang ke jalan Allah dan kemudia menjaga adab rumahtangga

-> masuk syurga 500 tahun lebih awal daripada suami, menjadi ketua 70,000 maalaikat dan bidadari, dimandikan di dalam syurga, dan menunggu suami dengan menunggang kuda yang dibuat dari pada yakut.

15. Meninggal dalam keadaan suami redha -> masuk syurga.

Pegi cucuk diri kamu sendiri

2010-02-23T12:22:00.011+01:00

Go fuck yourself.

No offense peeps. I wasn't trying to curse or anything but that's exactly what I heard on the idiot box from a show called Orange Roughies (roughies???) on TV 1. Apparently the con-man is a Malaysian who can't speak English and that was what he said to the police officer (pegi cucuk diri kamu sendiri) which later were translated by his translator as go fuck yourself. Te he he.

Apart from the daily tasks as a ~~hot wifey~~ house wife, I've got something to really look forward to this coming Friday.

I'm getting a keyyyyyboarddddd! Yeayyyyyy! A high performance WK-series from Casio with 76 real size touch sensitive backlit keys, exactly the specs that I wanted! Well, even more actually coz I initially only wanted a standard real size 61 key. Thank you sayang!!!! Love yaaaa!!!! Muahx muahx! Sorry I fought with you in the morning. And afternoon ;p

So hubby said he'll get everybody on North Shore to come over Saturday night to hear me play. Ya rite. Bluweekkk. My palms are sweating, my lips are twitching and like what the Brits always say, I just can't bludeh wait! Ngeeeeeee ;D

On another note, I am quite worried about the work permit. Haven't got much time left until my visitor's visa expires on the 10th of April. I've undergone the medical check-up which cost us 470 dollars at Sunnynook medical centre, Sunset drive and Apollo drive last week and the results were all good except for my urine and iron level. The urine was contaminated (had no idea I had to do mid-stream tssk) and apparently I've got iron deficiency therefore, was required to undergo another test just to be sure. The second result wasn't that good either as I was informed that my iron is still extremely low though I had steak the night before. They're setting me up with hubby's GP next Monday for consultation and we'll see how that one goes.

Other than that, there's much to be thankful for. I am beginning to fall in love with this new place called home. The serenity, the calmness, the feel of the different colored sand and the grass underneath my feet. The knowledge that I can be at the beach to ride the waves every single sunny day. To go for quite walks or even a dip in the pool with darling hubby whenever he gets back from work. The knowledge that you're in such proximity to the city, but so far away from the hustle bustle and bad traffic. The fact that you can go do your groceries anytime of the week, even at 2am in the morning in your PJ.

I miss my girls. I miss hanging out and lazing around at Intan's place. I miss lunch and movies with Ennie and Farah, and karaoke too! I miss my sunday brunch with Ai. I miss trying to fit in Sham's very busy schedule. I miss chatting with Ain. I miss K.radhi's company and her mean mushroom and chicken in oyster sauce. I miss the sporadic emails and lunches with Adek and Epit. I miss sharing my secrets, thought, insecurities, hopes and dreams with darling Ijah and mek yue. And lately, I've been missing my Erasmus comrades too. Ton, Paras, Lis, Preston and Jun. I wish you all well and I wish you all find whatever it is you're looking for in life.

Jangan sayang sangat

2010-02-22T20:21:00.000+01:00

Nanti sakit.

Love like you've never been hurt?

Bull shit.

Resolution

2010-02-01T05:23:00.009+01:00

My brain's kinda dead by now. Life has been on halt work wise, for the last 45 days. Funny that when you're working you're dying to be on leave, but when you're on leave it's the other way round. I guess we shall never be satisfied with what we have.

It's probably a little tiny weeny late for a new year resolution. Not that I've been following any for the last 28 years. Bohoooo. Though it does feel good to write them down coz it gives me some ideas on what I want to do coz I usually forget. Better than sitting like a lazy bum for the rest of the year aye? Also, it's good to be sharing them with you guys coz it'll made me turn red if I don't ever get them all done. So be sure to ask me by end of this year. Muehehe.

1. Learn spanish

2. Learn how to read notes and play keyboard

3. Start a Permanent head Damage.

4. A good scholarship.

5. A part-time job

6. Brush up on swimming and play more sports

7. Lose 6kg for good

8. Cut down on sugar, carb and fat. Eat more greens & 5 servings of fruits per day

9. Drink lotsa water

10. Read, listen and watch more

I have a good feeling that I won't get any of it done but what the heck.

On another note, I am still at odds with other Malays in North Shore. I can't seem to find a common ground on how to connect. Half of the ladies are doing their PhD while the other half are stay-at-home-moms. I met one family from my hometown with 4 adorable kids ranging from 2 to 11 years old. I taught them how to swim once and now the mother is thinking of sending them to me on weekly basis. Not that I mind. In fact, I think I would really enjoy their company. Yesterday we played basketball while the other moms were chit-chatting. I wonder what the other moms think of me. Hmmm. Why can't I find people like you girls here???

People have been asking me whether I like this new place called home. You know it's a difficult question for a fickle minded person like me coz the answer varies from time to time. One time I feel bored to death, another time it feels like Nirvana. From time to time it does occur to me that the ETs really do exist and they're doing an excellent job here - abducting people, that is. Sometimes I strain my ears real hard to listen to people's voices but nope, I only get the sound of the wind and on my lucky days, a meowww. A really faint meow from Salwa. Go figure for a country with 4 million people but 40 million sheep.

Life is pretty much a holiday around here. People seem to take their hobbies a tad too serious but it's good coz they've got cool ones like cycling and surfing and yatch-ing and other water sports that I don't even know their names nor existence before I came down here. They even do cycling on one wheel, like wth??? It's the kinda place where you just pat you friend on the back and say "Hey dude, wanna go ride some waves?" when you don't know what else to do. The other day we went to Piha to watch the World Junior Surf Championship. And on another day we went boogie boarding at Omaha after strolling at Matakana which is also known as the slow-food town simply coz they're against the fast food industry. All within 45 minutes from home. 5 minutes and uphill, you can go see some horses and feed them carrots if you feel like it. Believe it or not.

Signing off for now.

With love.

The aftermath

2010-01-20T02:49:00.005+01:00

2 hari lepas kawen saya mimpi melawat taman monyet bersama hubby dan makan yong tau foo berharga RM120 segelas. You read that right. The yong tau foo was half full (note how I use half full rather than half empty after marriage.muehehe. Am I making any sense? whateverrrr). It was also presented to us in a glass rather than a bowl, in water rather than soup. Hubby took a look at the price tag, refused politely and paid RM10 as compensation to the hawker for declining the meal. Betapa mulianya suami saya walaupon dalam mimpi. Apekah? Sayang, was that supposed to be our honeymoon? At taman monyet? Why oh why????

As spooky as it may sound, I dreamt of monyet again last night. This time in the form of Avatar. We were watching the trailer for Avatar before we went to bed, hubby thought it was cool and suggested that we go watch it in 3D today. As much as I want to give it a pass, being a good wifey that I am *ahem* I agreed so we'll be having our first movie as man and wife at 5.50pm today at Hoyt Silvia Park. That made me dreamt of a pitch black menace monkey for the whole night. Lucky he was cute though and behaved well towards the end. I can still see his face staring at me even now. Duh.

Okay let's wrap up the monkey business for now.

Marriage has been bliss so far. We are taking things easy so the transition has been quite smooth. Being an amateur cook, I went to bed late the first night that we arrived in Auckland to prepare the spices for nasi lemak and got up earlier than usual to cook our first breakfast here. Poor hubby got up 3 times that night looking for me as he felt bad for leaving me in the kitchen all alone though I insisted that he should be in bed due the long journey that we had earlier that day. Lucky he loved my dish and couldn't thank me enough, so he brought me to this cool German bar at Mission Bay which serves really scrumptious dishes for dinner. We had masak lemak mussels, tomato soup and chips and waddaya know, it was indeed the best mussels and tomato soup I've ever tasted my whole life! Like seriously! The mussels were huge, at least 4 times the size of mussels in Malaysia, fresh, sweet and chunky, the tomato soup was cooked together with cream and cheese and the taste just kinda explode in your mouth. The coolest really! After the slow walk by the beach, darling hubby took me to Parnel to have a taste at the Chocolate Boutique, a small but packed cafe which serves killer chocolate deserts of all kinds. All this for the small effort of nasi lemak? Cool aye? Maybe that's what people say that when you give, you get back so much more.

Signing off for now. Have so much to share but till then, adios!

Thank you girlfriends!

2009-12-15T17:11:00.011+01:00

Mon - Raya @hometown
Tues - movies with besties. Two words: Jacob = HOT!
Wed - YTM's award and hen's dinner. Yummylicious!
Thurs - Zzzzz
Fri - Natrah the musical. Thanks peep for the free tix! Gorgeous Remy. *drool*
Sat - hen's & movies. Awesome food. Hail Chillis!
Sun - girls day out. Love u girls to bits.
Mon - ??
Tues - teh tarik session
Wed - hen's. Uber cool band, funny + sentimental dedication, cute headgear, yummy dinner + cake. What more can I ask for? ;D
Thurs - back to hometown
Fri - IJ's solemnization. Cried a tiny bit. She didn't see it though. He he. Congrates dearie!
Sat - IJ's reception. Lucky maid-of-honour? Yours truly, thank you very much.
Sun - wed prep
Mon - Zzzzzz
Tues - farewell lunch
Wed - farewell breakfast

Haven't had much rest for the last couple of weeks. Comrade's coming back to town this coming weekend, fiancee's flying home next Tuesday. I don't need happy pills, for I HAVE BECOME THE PILLS! muehehehe.

Apart from the bulging tummy, life has been swell.

Cheers!

Double celebration for the day!

2009-12-02T18:21:00.004+01:00

Alhamdulillah, me and a bunch of others were selected to receive Scholar Excellence Award 2009 from Yayasan Telekom Malaysia. The certificate and gifts were presented by none other than our very own Group CEO Dato' Zam Isa, so hooray for that! Press from various media were also invited to cover the ceremony so it was kinda cool to have both the GCEO and the press together coz it made me feel special and important (poyo). The dude from Harian Metro took my photo and details so I was guessing that he wanted to feature me for the recipient of the Master's degree award but unfortunately I had to leave before he had the chance to do a proper interview as I had training to attend to after lunch. Bummer, else you might see me in tomorrow's edition. Perasan. I am still crossing my fingers for the photo to come out muehehe gile glamour tak aku? 2 kali poyo. Whatever.

I wanted to leave before lunch took place but my tummy was telling me not to so I stayed put and boy, was I glad I did coz lunch was scrumptious! We had meat soup as starters while mains consist of white rice, ikan merah masak lemak cili api, black pepper meat, butter prawn, tofu with soy sauce and chilly asparagus. Left before desert was served, so not only did I miss my favorite portion but also the press conference and teh tarik session with the GCEO which came afterwards. Another bummer.

I guess YTM did not have much to spare as the scholars did not receive any remuneration as we did last time. Few years ago instead of receiving nicely wrapped gifts, we were presented with a simple brown envelope but with RM1k cheque enclosed instead. Cool aye? Furthermore, it was held in Holiday Villa Subang and parents were invited to join the event so it was kinda cool to see how proud they were to see their kids on stage. This time, it was held at Level 50 of Menara TM instead but despite that, all was good and I am greatly thankful for the recognition so again, Alhamdulillah ;)

On another note, met up with SS and SJ at Telawi's for dinner - love the ambience at La Bodega. We did not go for tapas as it was quite pricey for such small portions so each had normal western meal (duh) - cheese burger, roasted and sauteed chicken. There goes my diet but nevertheless thanks SJ for the exquisite meal! Ohh not forgetting SS for coffee and choc cake afterwards, it was awesome! Anyway, haven't met SJ for so long as she was busy with her wedding preparation - hall booking, invitation, house reno and all. Mentang2 la bf belikan duplex condo kat Damansara! I envy you babe! ;p

It has been a good 10 years since I've known them and I am pleased to say that both girls have done me proud. SS is currently working in an internationally recognized oil and gas company while SJ is in the insurance industry. We've been through a lot together and I sincerely hope that this friendship will last a lifetime. I would say lots have changed since the last decade - both have grown into successful, mature adult and I salute you two for becoming the person that you are today! Each is embarking on different challenges and journeys and I wish them the best of luck in all that they do - you two are always in my prayers ;)

Photos to come.

From top to bottom: yummy; yummy; yummy; from YTM, from SS, thanks dearie!

Penat

2009-11-28T18:01:00.011+01:00

Ini adalah entry melepas perasaan: dont say I didn't warn ya peeps.

I am dead tired with questions pertaining to my fiancee. Some friends seemed to be overly concerned with the fact that I am engaged to a dude who is 12 years older than me. I have been asked various questions ranging from his bank account up to my parent's approval.

I would not say it did not hurt me as some of them came from those who are dearest to me. What amuses me the most is those questions came from friends with good educational background, work in top notch companies yet the mentality?

I'd say shallower than a kiddie pool. Nothing much to dig in there.

I mean, do I look like some bimbo who's got dollar signs in my eyes? Or someone who's marrying a dude who can be considered my dad? Am I ugly to a point I have no options and have to make do to anyone who proposed?

Last time I checked my advanced European masters degree is still intact in the blue folder. And I still receive my monthly paycheck from what many considered a reputable company. I may not go on hot dates every Saturday night but I think I look decent enough to have had boyfriends and dates over the years to be able to say that most men suck. Big time. Yeah, just like you. With pea sized brain who act like assholes.

What's with the age? What's the big deal about it? Tell me pretty please coz I just don't get it really. And what's with the question of whether he is rich? Even if he is, then what? Aren't you supposed to be happy for me? Does it make me a tramp for wanting to be with someone who has a good job and a decent paycheck?

Is age a breaking point? A go or no go? Maybe it is if you're marrying someone who can be considered your dad or your grandpa. But is 12 bloody years too much? Heck, he can even be your brother. Maybe he is a tad older, so what? Have you ever considered other questions to ask? Like whether he is a nice chap? Someone who comes from a good family? Is he responsible? Does he has good education / job? Is he smart enough for me to be able to look up to him? Does he make me laugh?

Would it matter if I told you that he is a super nice chap up to a point he is taken advantage off over and over again? Or that he was badly heartbroken once yet still wishes her the best in all that she does? Would it matter if I told you that he contacts his mother and sisters almost daily even when he is thousands of miles away? Would it count that he was the youngest chap by at least 10 years to have ever run the school? Or the fact that he goes out to lunch at least once a week with his janitor, and invites her to the school's fiesta when everybody else look down on her?

Maybe not. Coz no matter what I say you would still think that I am going for his money or probably snatching the first moving thing that comes my way.

I'm sorry if your hubby / boyfriend is having trouble to make ends meet and have to rely on you at the end of the month. I'm sorry that you have to chip in a hefty sum for that roof over the head and the furnishing even when it is his duty to provide. I'm sorry that he does not help you in the kitchen or with house chores even when he is not the sole breadwinner. Or the fact that he is not sensitive enough to remember your birthday and appreciate your sacrifices even when you bore him his child.

Just coz you're in deep shit, it doesn't make it right for you to condemn. Or is it jealousy that I sense?

2009-11-22T18:13:00.002+01:00

You dated a guy for 6 bloody years and he wasted it on a bitch, yet had the guts to come crying to you and tell you that you're the very best thing that ever happened to him.
You dated a serial dater who told you that he had his eyes on you since the first day you two met, but who were you kidding?
And then you met someone who's smart, kind and sweet, and you thought hey, you've hit the jackpot big time. But then again, even the sweetest guy screw you and took you for a ride.

Men are just full of crap.

What the hell was I thinking when I said yes?

I go crazy when it's the time of the month. Bear with me honey.

I go crazy when it's the time of the month

2009-11-22T17:00:00.008+01:00

cha ya nun alif celaka.

Melantak sudah tidak ada lagi dalam kamus hidup saya

2009-11-09T08:20:00.009+01:00

Iye la tuh.

Tadi pagi saya makan meehoon goreng dengan telur mata dan sambal. Nak di jadikan cerita sambal tu ada belacan tapi saya belasah jugak. Habis la zit face muka saya pagi besok. Elok la tu, exactly what I needed. Lunch time pulak saya nekad pegi aerobic. Time melompat ok lagi, tiba time floor exercise memang saya kantoi. Huhu sangat sedih menjadi gemok dan takde stamina. It's 4.19 p.m here, I haven't eaten since and my tummy is making noises. LOTS of noises.

By the way, comel kan daisypath kat atas tuh? Main main dgn benda tu tetiba semalam baru sedar yang shoot, I only have like a month, 3 weeks and 2 days till the big day. Sempat ke nak kurus nie? Mati la pakai baju kahwin macam sarung nangka la gamaknya.

Anyway, I recently bought myself 2.5 meters of beaded off-white lace and also, 4 meters of off-white satin. Like I mentioned in the previous entry, I wanted to initially make baju kurung moden for all 3 ceremonies including the reception, so smart me figured that I'd be using 2 meters for the baju and half a meter to make patches to the kain and veil as to not look like a moving curtain (y'know, in a full body beaded lace. Ke cantik ah?). Anyway, few days ago I came across a simple yet elegant design on the internet which is perfect, I tell you, PERFECT for my white theme wedding. I emailed the photo to my mom and the first thing she said was "Eh, awak tu tembam. Boleh ke design macam nie? Nanti nampak perut boncit lak. Plus you need at least 3 meters for this kind of design." So there goes my dream dress :(

Apart from that, THE PERFECT DRESS is also made off french lace which cost a bomb and would definitely put a hugeeee hole in my pocket but I soooo want it like badlyyyy, teruk kannnnn? Told dear fiancee about it and obviously he thinks it's ridiculous to spend that much moolah for a 4 hour event plus you might not wear the dress anymore in future since it is white. Huwaaaaaa! Saya nak jugak boleh tak??? Saya tak boleh tido malam terkenang baju tu so can I please pretty please have it pleaseeeeeee?? Yes this is me bridezilla speaking! Tapi saya takut mak saya tau nanti dia marah. So much for kenduri kesyukuran nak beli kain harga tak masuk akal.

Annnyway, was talking to a colleague today and showed the same photo and he said "Go ahead! First of all you are not fat and second of all everybody has got tummy and you can always wear corset to cover it up". Tapi kan cemana nak cover kelebaran dari tepi lak??? Beats me.

Sangat sedih menjadi gemok.

Little nephew camwhoring with my mac!

2009-10-30T17:05:00.018+01:00

"Uhh uhh what's this cik ngah?"
"Hmm what's this little button?"
"Oh wow it takes photos just like ayah's camera!"

"Then maybe I should do my usual twist! To the left..."
"...and to the right!"
"Goshh cik ngah this is so much fun!!"
"Come on dude check this out!"
"Ayah pleaseeeeee I'm not done with this!! Cik ngah helppppp!!!"

Nama: Adam
Umor: 3 1/2 tahun
Character: Sangat nakal dan hyper. Berpeluh macam mandi kalu kejar dia dalam shopping complex. Kecik kecik dah pandai camwhore thanks to the father who owns a DSLR and uses him as his favorite subject.
Kepandaian: Pandai mengeja dan menaip walaupon tak pandai cakap thus pandai meng-google dan meng-youtube his favorite cartoons i.e Upin Ipin, Pingu etc. We were at awe when he read out loud my dad's registration plate when he was 2 1/2 years old. Smart kiddo!
Hobbies: Computer games and obviously, camwhoring. Apa nak jadi daaaaaa he he.

Sib baik comel. Sayaaaaaaaaaag Adam muahhhhhhhh!

Kids are simply adorable aren't they? ;)

Asam pedas, one brilliant movie and best of friends. Just how I like it best.

2009-10-28T12:03:00.014+01:00

Unlike most people who blog, I often spend hours in front of my lappy to finish up an entry. I love writing and all but I find it hard to concentrate and words never seemed to be on my side or flow like the river when their inside my head. To translate what's inside my mind into words is like asking little boys to sit and do geometry. They'll love the mechanical aspect but will take hours to merely do a circle by staying still. Errr is that even a decent comparison? See what I mean?

Anyways, I've just lost a whole stack of DVDs that I got from last year *haiyak there goes my collection* so a friend had to buy a brand new VCD of Sex and the City for our movie-watching last night. That movie never fails to move me and I was in fact an avid watcher of their series a couple of years ago. I know some people think it's lame but I personally think the scripts were brilliant, the characters were distinctive and fun, and the storyline was simple but awesome as it was mainly about men and relationships but it just gets to me every single time, know what I mean? Oh and not forgetting thanks much to another friend for that mean asam pedas ikan parang. Gosh I am salivating as I am writing this so dear friend can we have another feast of asam pedas soon please? He he.

Oh did I tell you people that I simply love My sassy girl? Not the American remake but the original Korean version that had me laughing and crying at the same time!

I think I've read somewhere that it was the first Korean film that won an international award back in 2002 perhaps? What got to me the most was the fact that it was a true story so being a romantic at heart *bluwekk* it made me believe that there is still good (men) in the world though they might be scarce he he. It was about pure love and fate and just that. I love simple storyline but one that manages to give your heart a tug, know what I mean? For those who have never seen the film I urge you to and for those who are interested in the plot you may just want to check this out. Shall we have this on our next DVD watching session girls?

I am currently down with a slight fever and am on MC since 11 am this morning. Had my steroid dosage after brunch so things are looking a bit more promising though my nose is still running. Apart from that, life is swell and I have much to be thankful for.

Good night everyone, may we have a better week ahead. Adios!

The latest dope

2009-10-28T00:40:00.000+01:00

Haven't seen this around, have you?

Kinda boring at first, but once you get the hang of it - it gets more interesting and quite a page turner that I had trouble putting it down. Kudos to the Musas for a brilliant book which looks into Malaysia in the 70s. I do not think it is available in the local bookstore but hey, I haven't been looking for one so who knows? (To those interested probably you can check out eBay or Amazon but I suppose it must come with a hefty postage fee). Apart from the bureaucracy dramas and the infamous telephone saga (ape ke he TM dolu2 nie? buek malu den jo!), also included were some juicy stories regarding the royals which shall not be revealed here but I can bet ya, will leave you in awe.

So what are ya waiting for? I say go get the book and enjoy the read!

The weekend that was and October babies

2009-10-26T14:47:00.011+01:00

First thing I did when I woke up last Sunday morning was to look up fesyen pengantin berbadan gempal. Did not get much info so I googled fesyen pengantin berisi instead. Told SS about it while having brunch later on which made her laughed her heart out. Errr what's so funny about that??
Anyway, all that came out were a bunch of baju kurung moden and gowns with flowing skirts below the bust. I think I'll opt for a simple baju kurung moden for all 3 ceremonies. Hey, less is more isn't it? ;)

My fiancee (ohh did I told you people that I got engaged?) got tired of me complaining a whole lot about my body so he asked me to list down 10 things I loathe about me and to read them out loud.

1. Gemoks - back to old figure of 54kg. Yikes!
2. Rabun - anyone has RM 8k to give out to charity? I look like a geek in glasses so I am in serious need of LASIK!
3. Botak - yep my hairline is receding tsk tsk!
4. Jongang - my teeth are 8mm overjet which has been confirmed by none other than a dental specialist merangkap bakal kakak ipar saya. Imagine your teeth being inspected by your future SIL only to find out that not only you need braces but drilling too for the holes on two of your molars. Talking about giving a good impression on your first meeting. Hmmm...
5. Ass the size of Africa - need explanation NOT!
6. Peha besar drumstick
7. Jari kaki yang pelik - sbb yg #2 lagi panjang dr yg lain so macam terkeluar gitu
8. Boroi
9. Pekak
10. ...

Can't remember the last one but I think I actually ended up with 11 instead of 10.
And you know what he said? "Ok sayang perfect 10! I take them all!"

;) ;) ;)

Anyway, earlier this morning while I was carrying my lunch box to the office which consists of a can of chicken soup, a ceramic bowl, a spoon and 2 apples; the paper bag decided to fail on me by ripping at the bottom. Had a little run of my life to catch those apples muehehe. I am a clumsy mumsy person yes I am but dear fiancee calls me cute instead! He he.

On a different note, I'd like to wish a very happy birthday to me yes ME! and a bunch of good friends who were born on this special month of October and have no idea about the existence of this blog he he.

To SS - Happy 28th birthday! Crossing my fingers for things to work out the way you want them to. Do take things one step at a time and prioritize your list. I know you can do it! Thank you for being such a good friend all these years and you know I'll always be here for you though we'll be thousands of miles apart! Stay ambitious, chic and positive!

To LP - Happy 27th Birthday! Stay happy and chirpy! Wishing for all good things to come your way. Wishing you all the best in your career and your new built up company. I know you'll make us proud! And thank you for being such a wonderful companion through out the whole duration. You've been awesome!

To PM - Happy 26th Birthday! Stay funny and sober! Let's hope Hotel Amalia's incident won't occur no more this time! Ha ha. That was good fun though. Wishing you too, all the best in terms of career and personal growth. I love the fact that you're so spontaneous and were able to crack jokes at almost anything! Just stay you!

To CM - Happy 31st birthday! Though not an October baby, I feel like it would be unjust to leave you out from the list. Stay Mr Nice Guy, ethical, honest, and all there is that made you YOU! You've been an inspiration and have taught me much about love and life. As always, I wish you all the best life has got to offer.

Have a nice week everyone!

Love text #1

2009-10-25T02:03:00.004+02:00

Him:
"Boring wee la jalle soghe"

Me:
"Hmm me too boring soghe pahtu gemok cam badak lak tu don't even look nice in a white kebaya yep i am dooomed and you're gettin a fat ass wife! huwarghh tensen."

Him:
" Pade doh you're gettin an old cog, dark and none of a prince charming whatsoever ooo paghok. But with lots of love!

How can you not love the guy?

Bak kata meishi. Yep, I am in kuch kuch hota hai mode. Ha ha.

Love letter #1

2009-10-05T14:23:00.013+02:00

" This could well be one of the love letters we talked about. It is going to be fractionally small, as then you would have to squint and hold it close to you. Closer to your heart, closer to your mind. I am about to wake you up in a few minutes time so that I can show what I am packing in, in a small package to you - the Quran (and its translation and commentaries), a pen, a pencil and a journal. I am not doing quite well in term of writing love letters, am I? Suffice to say perhaps, I fell asleep last night thinking of you, and woke up this morning wanting to call you. Therefore, it would be so much easier if only we went to bed together last night, then I would not have to start punching numbers or using the mouse - I would simply kiss you on your forehead, play with your hair, and whisper good morning gently in your ear. One day, not long from now. "

Love you always,
Mr X

280909

Someone is gonna puke on this one but what the heck!

2009-10-01T16:41:00.011+02:00

-----Original Message-----
From: Ms Y@tm.com.my
Sent: Thu, 1 Oct 2009 16:51:50 +0800
To: Mr X@inbox.com
Subject: FW: gambor raya

Tak cun langsung. Dah la gemok, zit face lak tuh. at the age of 28.
yucks.

Sure u still wanna marry me?

-----Original Message-----
From: Mr X@inbox.com
Sent: Thu, 1 Oct 2009 01:17:02 -0800
To: Ms Y@tm.com.my
Subject: RE: FW: gambor raya

<Sure u still wanna marry me?>

answers:

1. Yes, so long as you'll have me.
2. Yes, so long as you take me as I am.
3. Yes, so long as you do the above and wear your heart on your sleeve, for me.

> Mr X.

refer attached photo!

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Gambar dirahsiakan sebab sangat gemok hokeh!

But isn't he the sweetest? ;)

Beauty is only skin deep

2009-09-14T11:02:00.011+02:00

So I got it all nicely layered - the Swiss roll on the bottom, followed by custard, then a can of mixed fruits, and finally the jelly to finish it off.

I even lined up some sliced peaches and made it into a flowery shape just so it'll look prettier.

But I burned the custard during preparation.

So you can imagine the look on everyone's faces when they first laid their eyes on it.

And the look on their faces when they actually tasted it.

Ha ha.

The same rule applies when it comes to people.

They may look pretty on the outside - well, if you can even call them pretty in the first place. But once you get to know them, it might be a whole different story.

Like I said, beauty is only skin deep.

I rest my case.

This one goes out to my precious

2009-09-12T07:09:00.022+02:00

We only managed to shove half of it down our throat. Yep, that huge steamed siakap, chilly prawn and Chinese style fried veggie - all home cooked. Chef in action: RA, MJ and yours truly. Thank you very much.

Food indulgence is customary whenever MJ is back in town. The usual trio - MJ, MY and myself would wallop everything just like the piranhas. It boggles me sometimes how ecstatic we could get when it comes to food - yet the trash bin is our bestie, well, at least for me and MJ whenever we try to fix something up in the kitchen. Thank god things are looking more promising nowadays as compared to few years back. Te he he. We drove to MY's place later on to pick her up and made ourselves comfortable at Bangsar's Starbucks. Got myself an Americano, while MY treated herself in hot choc and MJ in passion tea to help with her sore throat.

Had a blast with my two girls, as usual. Sometimes it feels like these two are the few remaining sensible people left, at least in my world. Foxy on the outside (wink wink!), beautiful on the inside. I guess what brought us together is what we value in life. Many I've met are just plain empty. Many are after those that do not really matter. Some are vain, while some think they're better than the rest - when in truth they have nothing to offer. Some think being verbally honest is the way to go when all they do is hurt those that are dearest to them. Often I chose to ignore, but at times it gets to me and when that happens, I chose to be silent. I mean, why bother?

But I can bet you not these two. They're deep, genuine, and most importantly they've got substance and that my friend, makes them classy. They seek for the same qualities on the XY gene and that's what makes it so difficult for not many posses similar attributes. I say be patient, for exceptional people are hard to come by - not in terms of look, style, rides nor bank accounts, but in terms of characteristics, values and beliefs.

I wish both of them the best of luck in their journeys ahead. May it be a road worth traveled and may both of them find peace and self realization through it all. Been there, done that. It ain't gonna be easy, but I'm sure it'll be worth it. To MY - break a leg and do us proud - we know you'll ace it smart girl! To MJ - stay calm, step on it with two steady feet and I'm sure you'll do just fine ;)

Love you both! XOXO ;)

From top to bottom; our steamed siakap - what's with the horrific face mr fish?; chilly prawn and fried veggie - mind the mismatched dinnerware.

Happy Ramadhan 1430

2009-08-23T09:43:00.014+02:00

I got a morning buzz from a cousin a couple of days back who mentioned that my life is marked in colors. According to cousin I've got too much of a good thing going on that I'd be a benchmark among our cousins and that got her worried. Ha ha.

I'd say yup my life has been marked in colors though not all have been magnificently bright - some were dim and definitely, some dark ones too. It has been a roller coaster ride like many others - but a good one though. Despite the disappointments and heartbreaks I'd say it has been a hell of a journey and I wouldn't have it any other way. As the saying goes, what does not break you, makes you stronger.

Funny that our life is always observed through rose-tinted glass not by you, but by another human being. It is you and only you who knows the actual picture and the details for each happening, you who feel the pain and sorrow of all that are thought to be glorified events in one's life from another person's perspective. Ain't the grass always greener on the other side? Nevertheless, I still have much to be thankful for.

So, thank you cousin for reminding me of how good life is treating me. Cousin once mentioned that every family is dysfunctional in their own kind of way and I guess it is true to a certain extent. Nevertheless I thank god for a wonderful set of parents who love me to bits despite my flaws (though I kept reminding mother than I am somewhat of a good kid so PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE get off my back and let me be - a cry out which of course were continuously ignored by her...tsk tsk!) Also, I am thankful for the many good friends that I have for you girls have rocked my world! Not forgetting you, yes YOU - you know who you are ;)

On another note, I would also like to wish everyone a very Happy Ramadhan. May this holy month brings the utmost peace and joy to all of us. God bless.

How He Makes Me Feel

2009-08-14T19:50:00.003+02:00

Song by Hope - Who Am I to Say

He Who Does Not Know

2009-08-13T04:54:00.010+02:00

He asked me once, and I lied. I said nope, I do not write thus I do not own a blog. I didn't feel like I could trust him back then, so I simply lied.

He does not know about the existence of Cikitita.

We talked about many things. Everyday lives. And past relationships. He told me about his ex-girlfriend, his only girlfriend, and even that ended many, many years ago. I told him about me, about what I like and what I loathe, about people who are dearest to me.

I like him. In fact, I like him a whole lot. He is smart and witty, yet humble and unpretentious. He respects me. He does not get on my nerves.

He seems to know about a whole lotta stuff which makes me feel small, and stupid, at times.

He makes me laugh, he even makes me cry.

I guess it is true when they say love will come knocking when you least expect it.

Here we go again

2009-08-12T09:19:00.005+02:00

So the meter on my weighing machine has moved to the right. Not an extreme right but a lil teeny weeny right. But still.

My fingers were shaking as I clicked on the BMI calculator. I squinted my eyes to catch the result and to my surprise it was a good 21.7. Hey, not bad for someone who eats like a horse aye?

So I figure, hey, let's be done with the weight madness thingy. From today onwards, I shall eat whatever I want whenever I want wherever I want. I shall say goodbye to calorie count and high protein diet. No more of substituting roti canai for a capati. Or a glass of teh tarik for a teh C.

Ya right!

Deeper conversation

2009-04-01T02:54:00.005+02:00

Is your favorite color blue?
Do you always tell the truth?
Do you believe in outer space?
And I'm learning you

Is your skin as tanned as mine?
Does your hair flow sideways?
Did someone took a portion of your heart?
And I'm learning you

And if you don't mind
Can you tell me
All your hopes and fears
And Everything that you believe in
Would you make a difference in the world
I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation
Only you can make me

I let my guard down for you
And in time you will too

They say life is not the amount of breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away

2009-03-19T20:14:00.000+01:00

You showed me the little teddy and that almost got me into a fit. I didn't recognize it at first - not because I wasn't paying attention but because I didn't expect it to still be there. It never crossed my mind that you'd keep it this long and brought it with you across the Indian ocean. It still looks the same only that it doesn't have the tiny chocolate pouch on its tummy anymore coz you ate them all. Instead, it was holding some sort of flower that you got from an old lady who was selling it for charity. You were laughing when you told me about it probably because you think it's just plain silly. But I never thought about it that way - I know you didn't feel like buying but you just couldn't resist helping an old lady on the street could ya? That made my heart blossomed and I pray to God that you'd stay this way forever.

So I grabbed my little bull and shoved it to you. I wanted you to know that I too, still have it close to me. Sometimes I sleep with it in my arms. And when you asked me his name I broke down and cry.

I didn't mean too.

I'm sorry.

You showed me around and told me that you've gotten yourself a silky blanket and it made me wonder if the material makes you cold but you said no. Good, that ought to keep you warm at night. And you showed me the portable air-conditioner that keeps you cool during summer. I saw your so-called wardrobe where you've gotten all your clothes nicely hung. It doesn't look like you shop much. Or probably you have others stacked nicely somewhere in the room. Always a neat you are, I know.

It was funny seeing you putting that helmet on. It felt like nothing had changed. It felt like the good old days where we used to laze around and make good fun of each other, where you told me about your days and I told you about mine. Take good care on the road will ya? Promise I won't tell your mom.

I'm glad you got all your money back. I hope the market will do you good this year and the upcoming year as well. It was good hearing you laughed when I told you that I lost my only potential client due to procrastination. And that I still keep everything in a bond simply coz I'm a chicken. He he.

It was a very nice chat indeed but I was on the verge of breaking down again so I said so long. Good bye. Till next time. Adios.

p/s: I'm ok and will be ok. You take care ok best buddie?

More love notes

2009-03-16T02:56:00.027+01:00

I think I shall turn this blog into our virtual love nest where I can spill everything that is in my head. This is kinda crazy you know because it kinda look like I am living my life in the past but then again I am pretty much happy with the past and if the past keeps me happy then so be it aye?

I remember seeing you the first time in that small room with the rest of the crowd and sorry to say baby you were off no significance to me. You were just another bloke nothing better than the rest. I never really took notice in you until a few weeks later when I saw you looking all nice in your S size maroon t-shirt and your grey corduroy, very stylish and strong with your spiky hair and that noticeable biceps on your arms. And I said to myself, Geez, what a lost. The guy must be gay.

From time to time I would let out small giggles when I think of how everything fell into places between us as we are off different world that it was almost crazy that we actually hanged out. But hey they say opposites attract so probably that was what happened back then aye? If I am not mistaken I remember you telling me once that you fell for me for my bubbly-ness and my contagious laughter perhaps? And I fell for you for your big heart and principles. I have never met someone quite like you before.

It took us sometime to hit it off owing to the fact that we see each other every single day. I remember how you would wait up for me so we could walk together everywhere. I remember how jealous you were of AD especially because you think he liked me. Ohh remember that
exact moment when MA came over and massaged you on your back? That got us both spooked! He he.

I am smiling right this very moment reminiscing all those precious moments spent with you. You made it all more colorful and worthwhile, such wonderful memories that left me with this sense of exhilaration whenever I am reminded of them. I am so glad that you were part of it all for it would not have been what it was were you not around. Such wonderful time it was, indeed.

...

2009-03-15T17:35:00.014+01:00

I kinda miss you today so here I am writing you a smoochy love note to get the feeling off my chest. I was looking through your profile and that picture of you standing in front of the huge Alcatraz reminded me of the good times we had merely some time ago. That had me smiling for a while looking at your once spunky short hair that I oh loved so dearly. I remember how close we were and how much I like being around you and you around me.

I remember how cool it was when you came over night after night to have dinner with my family. That made me fell even more for you and I remember thinking oh what a cool guy you were with such cool attitude. I remember how cute you were trying to convince my mom that I was a good cook and how my mom went ha ha thinking this guy must have been crazy to have said that about my daughter. Ohh how he must have been head over heels with her he he. And I remember how you went crazy every single night taking care of the dishes and my mom would go whispering to me on how long it took you to finish the chores. And I told my mom yeah he is like that mother he does everything in detail and he does everything good.

My mom and dad loved you dearly and I remember them saying how cool it would be if only you were a Muslim. Being a good person that you were they were pretty much sure that you would be one of those granted Heaven by Allah during the After Life. You might go ha ha when you read this dear but then again I am just sharing with you their inner thoughts. Not that it matter that you were not a Muslim but then again I guess things would have been different if you were one. I remember her saying what a gentleman you were and how you have got everything figured out since you seemed to have the solution to everything. But no you did not have a solution for us. Well can't blame you as I did not have a solution for us either.

I think you know how I am pretty much disappointed with how things finally turned out. I guess me being me I was hoping for some sort of miracle where you would leave everything just to be with me just like in the movies y'know? But life ain't no movie so here we are trying to sort all this mess that we had created ourselves. But don't worry baby I know this is killing you as much as it is killing me for things to have turned out this way. I know it kills you to not being able to be the person that I want you to be and for breaking my heart but then again darling you have got your own life, hopes and dreams and I can totally understand that really, even when I go ballistic over you from time to time.

Sometimes it made me wonder if your life experience has got anything to do with all of this. I never brought this up darling because I was afraid it would upset you but then again the question has been going over and over my head for the trillionth time. Do not ever think that you will turn out to be bad because I can bet you my life you will not because you are too good of a man.

I know I have said this before but I will say it again. I am glad our path crossed and I am honored to be given a chance to know someone as special as you are. People say you might be one person to the world but you might be the world to one person, well that person is me. You will always have a special place in my heart and I am sure I will be too in yours.

I wish you well and I wish that this life becomes all you ever wanted. I wish for us to be friends forever. I wish for all the happiness in the world because you deserve it baby.

The Rate Race

2009-02-23T04:12:00.008+01:00

I am not the type who is able to sit still. Put me in a routine for a month, and I'll fidget like crazy!

This 9-5 thingy is not working for me. I long to be outside, I long for the flexibility, I long for the ability to work at my own pace, whenever I want, wherever I want!

I love (cute & intelligent) kids, and I love being around them. I love the idea of painting their lives with positive values. And I love the idea of having a positive impact on a child. I, however, do not think I have the patience for those with learning disabilities nor those hyperactive-throwing-tantrum kids! (me being very honest here!)

I wish to have a book published. I wish to be able to write. I wish to have that story-teller ability, to have that flair for writing, to put a smile on people's faces, to have an impression to my readers. Big dream bohoooo!

I am still looking for that dream job. The job which allows me to wake up with a smile in the morning, to have the exuberance of getting to the work place, the one with the fulfilled and accomplished feelings at the end of the day.

I anticipate for the day when I'll finally figure it out.

Ideas anyone?

Mummy's Words of Wisdom

2009-02-20T16:06:00.004+01:00

We fought over some silly matter - well, silly to her, at least.

I needed her consent over this silly mission, and she flatly turned me down.

I got upset, and said some things which shouldn't have been said in the first place.

She sent me a text message which left me rather dumbstruck, and rather embarrassed that I had to play truce. (Darn, why must she be so damn smart?)

What she said was...

"Let me tell you what you have. You're intelligent, beautiful, healthy, surrounded by people who love you, a good job...kene bersyukur dengan apa yang ada dan selalu berdoa"

Thank you mummy for these wise words. I'll just post it here as a reminder to myself.

I love you.

Old Entry

2009-02-13T07:33:00.006+01:00

I was tidying up my blog and came across an entry which was still in draft and never got posted. I wrote it a year ago, somewhere in February I think, while struggling with my thesis.

I could not really remember why I got stuck into finishing this particular entry. Maybe I was having one of those writer's block halfway through. Heck, maybe I just got lazy.

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"It was a short 20 minutes ride from school after an early morning meeting with the supervisor. I was all alone in the bus, feeling bored and looking out through the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of anything interesting in the hope of amusing myself. I saw people going about their lives, hurrying to an unknown destination or simply enjoying the walk with their loved ones or errr, loved dogs. I saw bits of flowers here and there, blooming from the lifeless trees, indicating that a new season is coming.

To be honest I have always been expecting something different from these people, a different kind of life in this part of the world where life is said to be good and prosperous. Much to my disappointment, I see people doing the same thing everywhere I go. It doesn't matter where you are. You could be in london, paris or KL, people would still be doing the normal day to day stuff - they go to school, they work, do groceries, do the dishes, play with the kids, go out for the so called teh tarik session blah blah. I laugh at myself from time to time, thinking of how much expectation I had prior to coming here, just to see life so similar to what I had in my own country?? Haha what a joke!

But I do believe that I am somehow seeing things a bit differently now. Some in good, while others in a little bit of a distorted point of view, perhaps. It amazes me to see how many people back home are still blindly fooled by the mainstream media which are obviously controlled by the powers-that-be, while the oppositions are given zero access to it. It sickens me to see what sort of fool the current ruling party think of the people, or how investigations either get swept under the carpet or goes round and round, turning away from the actual issue.

It's also funny to think of how the Malays are so taksub with the believe that we are the race with the most budi bahasa. And how the West are poisoning the minds of our young ones with their lifestyle, culture and what not. Sape kata mat saleh takde budi bahasa?"
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Reading through this particular entry reminded me of the exact feeling I had on that bus.

Reading through this entry reminded me of how frustrated I was with the Malaysian politics, the grievance felt to the fate of my beloved country, not forgetting the complaint session with DCM!
(Thanks for being a great listener! :D)

Most importantly, reading through this entry reminded me of my old self.

I like my old self.

But I don't quite like the person I am turning into.

But heck, it's not too late to turn back time!

Thoughts

2009-02-13T05:52:00.004+01:00

They say it's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

I don't know if this is politically correct, nor sane.

I met someone, fell hard for him like I never thought I would, had tremendous love and butterflies over the period, and in the end, parted.

How can life be so cruel?

Beats me.

Have you ever felt so lonely in a room full of people
so hopeless
that you just wish to become invisible?

Have you ever felt so hurt
that you can actually feel your heart physically crumbling apart?

Have you ever felt so restless
that your brain just couldn't stop thinking
but you're still left clueless, and emotionless?

Have you ever felt the nothingness
of everything, and everyone?

Have you ever felt so tired of the pretension
off being happy and strong
when all you wanted to do was to curl up in bed and cry?

I did.

and still am.

But that's ok, coz I know that this too, shall pass.

Maybe it's true when people say love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.

Nevertheless, you're still the best thing that ever happened to me.

Are People That Ignorant Or Are They Just Plain Stupid?

2009-02-12T12:46:00.004+01:00

I came across this article while googling through the Internet.

It's called "Ten Politically Incorrect Truths About Human Nature".

Check out the full article at http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/index.php?term=pto-4359.html

Isn't this the craziest thing you've ever read???

4. Most suicide bombers are Muslim

According to the Oxford University sociologist Diego Gambetta, editor of Making Sense of Suicide Missions, a comprehensive history of this troubling yet topical phenomenon, while suicide missions are not always religiously motivated, when religion is involved, it is always Muslim. Why is this? Why is Islam the only religion that motivates its followers to commit suicide missions?

The surprising answer from the evolutionary psychological perspective is that Muslim suicide bombing may have nothing to do with Islam or the Koran (except for two lines in it). It may have nothing to do with the religion, politics, the culture, the race, the ethnicity, the language, or the region. As with everything else from this perspective, it may have a lot to do with sex, or, in this case, the absence of sex.

What distinguishes Islam from other major religions is that it tolerates polygyny. By allowing some men to monopolize all women and altogether excluding many men from reproductive opportunities, polygyny creates shortages of available women. If 50 percent of men have two wives each, then the other 50 percent don't get any wives at all.

So polygyny increases competitive pressure on men, especially young men of low status. It therefore increases the likelihood that young men resort to violent means to gain access to mates. By doing so, they have little to lose and much to gain compared with men who already have wives. Across all societies, polygyny makes men violent, increasing crimes such as murder and rape, even after controlling for such obvious factors as economic development, economic inequality, population density, the level of democracy, and political factors in the region.

However, polygyny itself is not a sufficient cause of suicide bombing. Societies in sub-Saharan Africa and the Caribbean are much more polygynous than the Muslim nations in the Middle East and North Africa. And they do have very high levels of violence. Sub-Saharan Africa suffers from a long history of continuous civil wars—but not suicide bombings.

The other key ingredient is the promise of 72 virgins waiting in heaven for any martyr in Islam. The prospect of exclusive access to virgins may not be so appealing to anyone who has even one mate on earth, which strict monogamy virtually guarantees. However, the prospect is quite appealing to anyone who faces the bleak reality on earth of being a complete reproductive loser.

It is the combination of polygyny and the promise of a large harem of virgins in heaven that motivates many young Muslim men to commit suicide bombings. Consistent with this explanation, all studies of suicide bombers indicate that they are significantly younger than not only the Muslim population in general but other (nonsuicidal) members of their own extreme political organizations like Hamas and Hezbollah. And nearly all suicide bombers are single.

A Reminder...

2009-01-14T07:45:00.000+01:00

Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.'

My Diet Log (Again)

2008-11-30T11:04:00.003+01:00

Check out my latest diet graph...

Can you believe the amount of weight that I've put on since the day I left Europe? It's histerical! Dear God, how did I manage to get myself into this mess? For all the effort that I put myself into for the last 1 1/2 yrs, I throw it all away for the sake of roti canai, mee goreng mamak and teh tarik! Darn!

Well guess what? Now that I've realized how much 'love handle' and 'muffin top' that I have accumulated on my bulging tummy, I've decided to take matters at hand (again). Nope, I haven't ditched the roti canai, mee goreng mamak nor teh tarik, but I'm slowly learning to take it sparingly, plus a 30-min-5-days-a-week work out routine in the gym, squash court or pool. I've also started to regularly consume virgin coconut oil (VCO) to help boost my metabolism (famous tagline of VCO: "drink fat, loose weight" -- haha).

The result?

I've lost a kilo on the 2nd week, and another kilo on the 3rd week. Pretty amazing what a daily exercise routine does to your body isn't it?

I'll keep on going til I get to my ideal weight, which is 47kg. Wish me luck!

Summoning old memories

2008-06-23T04:43:00.003+02:00

I have always felt a tinge of regret for not blogging at the start of my MSc course in 2006. Better late than never, so they say. Thus, I would like to take this opportunity to recall all those wonderful memories and faces during one of the most amazing moments of my life.

To friends and acquaintances of Advanced European ERASMUS MUNDUS MSc in Network and e-Business Centered Computing class of 06/08, it has been my pleasure to have known and worked with all of you.

Now, let us all go down the memory lane....

Taking it all back

2008-05-28T13:58:00.003+02:00

My last entry was a happy one - I was basically sharing my joy about being back home.

But guess what? I take it all back.

Don't ask me why.

I am tired with all the crap.

Just get off my back and leave me alone.

Back for good

2008-05-10T03:19:00.003+02:00

It's good to be back.

My Diet Log (ada unsur riak sket nie)

2008-03-15T17:24:00.009+01:00

Green Line: TREND a.k.a the weight that I am supposed to achieve at a certain date (based on the targeted weight over a certain period of time that I specified when I first signed up - actually dah lupa pon ape target)

Blue Line: WEIGHT a.k.a my current weight!!

Kehkehkeh sape nk tips angkat tangan ;D ;D ;D

WTF???

2008-03-12T15:29:00.012+01:00

I am utterly shocked and disappointed with the aftermath of the 12th general election.

No, I am not saddened with the fact that Barang Naik had lost another 4 states to Barisan Alternative (yes, I refuse to call them Barisan Rakyat from this day onwards), yet was hysterical and overjoyed with the humiliating defeat of BN for it has shown a great level of maturity of Malaysian voters.

Today I came across this entry in Lim Kit Siang's blog (yes I do read his blog religiously from time to time and so does Anwar's, so now you people know where I stand ok hehe. I know a lot of people tend to think he is racist but I USED to beg to differ, but probably not anymore)

"No DAP CEC mandate for PAS Menteri Besar in Perak

The decision to appoint a PAS Assemblyman Mohamad Nizar Jamaludin as Perak Mentri Besar has caused shock and consternation to DAP leaders, members and supporters.

The DAP Central Executive Committee, at its emergency meeting in Penang on Sunday, 9th March 2008, had given approval for the formation of a Perak coalition government comprising 18 DAP Assembly members, seven PKR Assemblymen and six PAS Assemblymen.

DAP is prepared to accept DAP chairman and Assemblyman for Sitiawan Ngeh Koo Ham or PKR Behrang Assemblyman Jamaluddin Mohd Radzi as Perak Mentri Besar.

As the appointment of PAS Assemblyman for Pasir Panjang Mohamad Nizar Jamaludin as Perak Mentri Besar representing the third and smallest political party in the proposed coalition has not received the mandate of the CEC, DAP Perak Assemblymen will stay away from the swearing-in ceremony for Perak Mentri Besar scheduled tomorrow. "

Can someone please, please explain to me what this is? Wahhh baru menang 3 hari dah nak gaduh? So much for Barisan Alternative coalition and all those talk! Please la DAP, do we really need this now? Everybody knows for a fact that as much as we want muhibbah and what not, it is a long way to go before a non-Bumiputera is accepted as an MB by the Malay majority. And as much as DAP is dissapointed with the selection, I think they need to step down on this case and make way for a candidate from a party which has a proven track record of ruling Kelantan for more than 18 years despite the financial blockage, at least for now! There is ABSOLUTELY no need to make this public, as it only shows disintegration among the coalition.

Another thing, please do not 'naik sheikh' or 'syok sendirik' for a lot of people only voted you guys (yes all of you DAP, PAS and PKR) simply because they will vote for anything BUT BN. Please make this work and prove your competency by delivering your promises of good governance, independant judicial and so forth. Do not let this victory be a one-term thingy as what has been experienced by PAS in Terengganu on GE 1999. And always remember that if the people have the power to put you up where you are now, they can also easily put you down on the next GE!

p/s: why don't PKR step up and take responsibility? I'm sure if they do DAP takde la mengamuk camnie!

p/p/s: nie ape kebende nie? So what now bloggers are no more beruk2 di jalan raya is it??

Sadiq's Story

2008-02-23T03:33:00.005+01:00

A heartbreaking story of an Afghan immigrant in the UK. I solute this young man for his bravery and strength, as well as thousands of other immigrants who risk their lives in providing a better life for their beloved family back home.

p/s: would love to give a BIG smack to the lady at Sainsbury's. Funny how people can easily pass judgment without knowing a single thing about another person, and even feel good about it afterwards!

p/p/s: Kite pening pk bile nk cukup duit nk tukar kete baru, nk beli umah, beli handbag baru, kasut baru, nk travel, yet these people risk their lives only to have enough food on the table. Sedihnye!!! Sy mmg manusia yg tak reti bersyukur :(

Kek keju saya

2008-02-19T02:45:00.005+01:00

2 minggu lepas mashimaro post gambar cheese cake yg dia buat ngn resipinye skali. Semenjak dua menjak dok negara omputih nie semangat masak sy berkobar2. Almaklum ler kalu malas masak asyik makan daun ngn telor jek la. Wahhh kalau la mak sy tau mesti dia bangga. Tp sy tak bagitau pon sbb sure mak sy tak caya. Penah skali kawan sy kt sini cakap sy masak sedap, mak sy respond "Maybe coz u don't know how Malay food is supposed to taste". Buek malu den jek!

Mulanye masuk dapur nie taktik jek bile malas wat research. Asal dtg jek penyakit tuh, mula la wat2 alasan nk masak itu la, ini la. Lama2 cam best la plak, cam release tension gitu. Bile sy ckp kt kawan jerman sy yg sy sronok masak, punye la dia terkejut. Maklumla telur goreng pon dia beli kt supermarket. Tp kalu kite masak wah2 kemain lg dia dok mengendeng. Disebabkn sy dah terbiasa ngn org2 yg tak reti berbudi dan suka amik kesempatan, sy slalu wat bodoh jek dan makan jek dpn dia walau pon dia dok menjeling2 dan kasik2 hint. Kejam tak sy?

So bile sy tgk gamba cheese cake tuh terketarq2 sy nk wat. Hari nie pi Carrefour tetibe teringat, ape lg sy pon borong la ingredients dia. Nk carik cream cheese, at least dah tau diorg panggil crema queso. Pastu carik double cream, kalu translate literally sure diorg panggil crema doble, tp carik punye carik takdek la plak. Nampak satu kotak nie mcm cream, tp nama dia nato de mortar, blasah je la. Patut kene beli gak condense milk, tp mane la nk carik kt sini, sy pon pk takpe la ganti ngn gula jek.

Sampai jek umah berkobar2 sy nk wat. Sy pon bukak la blk resipi mashimaro, pastuh sy search gak resipi lain kt internet, saje la mane tau nk tambah sana sini. Tgk resipi internet ni byk yg letak teloq, sy pon ngade2 nk letak gak. Ok la, dah blend seme siap baru tingat. Awat aku cerdik sgt letak telur dah x psl2 kene bake, padahal resipi mashimaro masuk fridge jek. Disbbkn oven rumah sy nie slalu menyebabkn blackout, sy pon pk 10x. Tp takkan nk mkn teloq mentah kot. Sy pon pk xpe la no choice, cek blk resipi kt internet nk tgk temperature bape. Diorg kate 350 degrees, tp oven sy sampai 250 jek, camana nie? Sy pk takpe la sy letak maksimum, tp sy double kn time masak tuh. Sy pon masuk oven n dok la kt dpn tunggu kek masak sambil wat keje. Lps 20 minit bau punye la harum satu umah. So sy dgn senyum kambing syok sendiri masuk la dapur nk intai. Mak aiiii terkejut nyah!!

Kek keju sy yg hampir rentung (Sebenarnye keadaan dia lg teruk. Tu saya dah buang byk yg hangus hahah)

Eii geramnye nape jd camnie!!! pastuh sy pk sorg2...ishk2 nape sampai cengini jdnye. Pastuh baru la sy teringat. Agaknye resipi tuh 350 Fahrenheit, bukan 350 Celcius! Sy bakar ayam pon 180 C jek...ape ke bedol ni weihhh!!!!

Verdict: wp hampir rentung, kek keju sy masih sedap! Tp manis sgt (mashimaro, sy dah letak 2/3 jek gula cam awk ckp tp still manis, pasnie nk try 1/3 jek).

Pelajaran hari nie: Kalu tak reti masak tuh buat2 ler ikot resipi jgn nk blagak pandai.

She's Heading Home...

2008-02-13T18:31:00.005+01:00

The so-called-friend is flying back to Germany for good this weekend. She broke the news 30 minutes ago and surprisingly I felt saddened by it.

Shouldn't I be jumping with joy?

I guess saying goodbye is always hard for me regardless of how good or bad the relationship is.

Everyone you meet will leave a footprint in your heart and teaches you some values in life.

Oh well, this is just the beginning of it. Wonder how it would be for the final goodbye in April :(

A Recipe For Those Lazy Days

2008-02-01T19:00:00.000+01:00

Ingredients:
200g pasta
1 large tomato, chopped
1/3 cup basil, chopped
1 cup shrimps, peeled and deveined
1 1/2 teaspoon coarsely grinded black pepper
1/3 cup grinded cheese (mucho gusto muah2x! the more the better! hehe)
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

Instructions:
1. Boil pasta till soft
2. Boil shrimps till cooked
3. Drain No.1 and 2, pour all of the ingredients in a big bowl and mix well

**Off-side note: Adding a cup of chopped parsley can do wonders to your bolognese sauce ;)**

A Chic Lit for Everyone

2008-01-29T02:29:00.003+01:00

DCM came back from the UK with a box of Krispy Creme and a chic-lit entitled P.S I Love You. I grinned from ear to ear. What could be better than lying on your bed with a good book and a dozen of donuts? ;D

Packed in a suitcase look-alike, straight from the vending machine in Gatwick. How cute!

Been searching for this book for ages around the city. Obviously you can find it rather easily in any major bookstores here, only that you have to read them in Spanish hehe. I guess the best part about being the 2nd most spoken language in the world is that all good resources are within your fingertip. Think of any good book in the market, I can pretty much assure you that they'll have one in their language. (Wonder whether our people would take up the opportunity if we have the same privilege. Reminded of how my brother used to joke about finding Malays in Kinokuniya - just go to the mag section, you'll find plenty of them muehehe)

Funny that I tried so many means of getting the book, only to end up with tons of unread chic lit piling up my desk. You see I am not a big fan of this type of genre, but I was dying to get my hand on this one due to the many good reviews I heard from friends. So after the huge disappointment with the local bookstores, I started hitting the online stores. eBay and Amazon do have plenty, only that it comes with a shipping fee that I was not too happy about (once a cheapskate, always a cheapskate hehe). While browsing I came across a collection of chic lit - 6 books for 10 quid inclusive of shipping... wallaaaaaa!! Being the ultimate skinflint, I purchased them straight away (Note: none of them has been read up till now. A lesson learnt - never buy something simply coz it’s cheap haha). Then there was also the trip to Oslo where I actually did found an original copy but decided not to buy it since everything was so expensive there. At the airport though, I suddenly felt a strong urge for some reading material to accompany the 3 ½ hr journey back to Madrid. Went looking for the book again, found none in sight, so I got myself a Marian Keyes instead.

People, people what can I say! Marian Keyes changed my perception of chic lit like you wouldn’t believe! It was both heartbreaking and comical – never had I shed so much tears and laughed so hard in a single book. To all those people who think chic lits are too shallow (errrr including myself), try this one and I guarantee you will change your mind!

As for P.S I Love You, I would say I was a little bit disappointed with Ahern's flair of writing after reading past a couple of pages. But I’ll do justice by sparing my full review till I am done with it.

Nevertheless, muchos gracias DCM for this lovely pressie. You're an absolute darl!

Turning Over a New Leaf

2008-01-28T14:15:00.001+01:00

D said I should blog more about positive stuff.

Looking back at past entries, I've come to realize that most of the stuff that I blogged about were total downers. Thing is, I consider this blog as my personal space in the cyber world where I am able to express myself and vent out all my angers and frustrations.

But maybe he's right. Maybe years from now I would be happier reading all the happy stories instead of all the yakking 'bout stuff that has not gone right. But for every long entry, there is a always a point that I wanted to get across. It is my personal perception of the environment and the people around me, and a reminder to myself about the kind of person that I should or shouldn't be. I guess it's easier to write about the stuff that bothers you instead of the things that make you happy as you tend to take those happy moments for granted yet dwell and sweat about your worries too much. Not so wise huh.

So here we go...from today onwards I am turning over a new leaf.

Grrrrrr....

2008-01-27T23:55:00.001+01:00

I hate Linux, I hate Asterisk, I hate all that has got to do with open source.
Period.

Drama Queen

2008-01-27T17:55:00.000+01:00

I spent the whole day yesterday helping a so-called-friend in her quest to the Centro de Salud a.k.a the local health center. She claimed she was weak, had diarrhea the whole night, and asked me to lend a hand in walking her to the center. I had no objection.

Called up several centers but none were picking up, went down to the nearest pharmacy to ask for information, gather the info, went up the flat, looked up Google map and decided it was too far for her to walk in that condition. Called a taxi and waited, only to be told an hour later that it was off the route. Grrr!

Okay, so we started walking towards the center, stopping here and there as she claimed she was in pain. I prevented myself from comforting her, didn’t want to take any of her bull shit, stood by the roadside looking for a cab. Wasn’t my luck. Walked some more, got there, registered and waited for only 10 minutes before she was called in. I waited outside, only to be called later to accompany her in the room. Saw her lying on the bed with an IV drip on her arm and started feeling really bad.

Shoot, she really is sick. How could I ever think she was bluffing it?

Several nurses came by every 5 minutes to check on her and every single one of them looked astonished as she kept on saying she was not getting any better. After probably the 5^th checked, one of them decided to send her off to the emergency room at the local hospital, stating further check up was needed as she was not getting better. She was stunned, asked the nurse to call a cab, but the nurse was insisting on sending her via the ambulance. She hesitated big time; said she was embarrassed. I convinced her to take up the offer; that it was ridiculous to feel embarrassed while you are in so much pain and how it would give her better priority over other patients.

She was freaking out and started shivering all over. All of a sudden she said that she was actually already feeling better on the way to the center, and how she was hoping to STILL BE SICK by the time she arrives at the hospital so the doctor wouldn’t think she was making it all up. I knew it! Somehow i kept myself calm, and told her it was silly of her to be wishing for that.

We were relieved to get there in one piece after a nasty 15 minutes ride on the ambulance, she was pushed on a wheelchair inside the room and both of us waited for 5 minutes as someone completed her registration. While waiting, some of the nurses and the people who brought us on the ambulance were talking cheerfully behind us and were even gossiping about both of us (that she was not local, didn’t understand much of Spanish and how I didn’t understand a word of it muehehe). She got really pissed off, thought they were treating us like animals. I thought it was hilarious, and errr obviously embarrassing. Ok so after 5 minutes, I was asked to wait outside and she was ushered inside a room. Waited for another 2 hours – slept, read, gobbled up sandwiches, drank hot choc, just any means to keep myself occupied. She came out, we took a bus back home while listening to her complaining about all the wrong description they put on her paper, got off, went around to look for an available pharmacy (the hospital only writes prescription, they don’t distribute medicine). Arrived home, prepared some lemonade for her, cooked dinner, and slumped myself to bed – I was dead tired.

Only then I started feeling sick to my tummy.

It was not her first time.

Yesterday was definitely not the first time that she deliberately allow herself to get sick in the hope of receiving attention and sympathy from people around her. It was her 3^rd attempt already. I remember the 2^nd time she was in the position; she refused to take any medication. The reason – she didn’t want to intoxicate her body with drugs anymore. Wow, so much concern for a person who practically lives on processed food everyday.

Of course nobody believes her; everybody knew she did it just to get herself off work. And of course everybody knew she was faking it; probably she was sick, but not as bad as she claimed she was. Yet every time she would drag herself to the health center, and complains about how long she had to wait and how bad they were treating her. She would lock herself in her room the whole day, only coming out when people were outside preparing a meal, and would go on and on about how she was too weak to prepare food on her own. She would leave all her dishes in the kitchen, expecting others to clear up her mess. She has had low blood pressure for years, yet never took better care of herself or even attempt to change her daily diet.

I asked her how she was doing early in the afternoon today.

"Ohh same old, not any better. Still hurt as bad as yesterday"

An hour later her friend came for a visit, and off they went. I was speechless.

She said she had had a bad childhood. She claimed she was raised in a messed up family. I believe this has lead her to become the kind of person that she is today. But you know what? I have known many friends who came from similar background, yet were able to take full control of their lives without having the need to mess up with other people.

Mad at myself for falling for her trap, yet another time.

KEGILAAN

2008-01-14T15:28:00.000+01:00

Masuk nie dah 4 kali buat correction. Nasib baik deadline hari nie. Agak2 kalu deadline lambat lg baper kali yek kene buat??
Org lain cuti Xmas berjalan. Ade pegi Greece, ade pegi Switzerland. Aku? Dok umah dediam siapkan keje.
Tp submission kali nie pon ade major correction jugak.
Teruk sgt ke paper aku? Aku yg bodoh ke dia yg cerewet? Cuba jawab.

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

What I Dread Most

2008-01-09T03:04:00.000+01:00

I dread for the moment when I have to pack my bags and leave this wonderful continent that has been home for the last 15 months.
AND I dread the moment when I have to say good bye to all these wonderful friends that have added so much colors to my life.

No matter how much u promise each other to stay in touch, u know things will never be the same again. :(

My Wish

2008-01-02T05:12:00.000+01:00

I hope that days come easy and moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

More then anything, more then anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it,
To your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more then you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more then you take.

Oh More then anything, Yeah, and more then anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it,
To your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more then you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

p/s: TQ darling ijah for this wonderful, wonderful song. and TQ for always being there for me!

p/p/s: Know what's the good part of feeling low? That u have good friends to cheer u up tho they're thousands of miles away!

Spanish Whispers

2007-11-30T15:53:00.000+01:00

Can you actually call it a whisper if you can hear word by word of what is being said by a person 15 feet away from you? Well probably not in our vocabulary, but it sure is for most of the students in my university.

I hate generalizing people based on their origin (as much as I hate it when people judge me because of my religion), but I can't help but feel there is a need to change something here. These students....they whisper too loud and jump the queue all the time. And these are university students, supposedly educated people who are working their a** off to get a scroll in ensuring a better life ahead.

Well too bad for me as these people do not share the same perspective as I do.

1) they think whispering is equivalent to uttering something in a "non-real voice" where you can't really hear the true tone or phonation or resonance or whatever you call it (gosh my English is getting worse yet my Spanish is not getting any better). Although you can make out every single word that is being uttered but yep, they still consider it as a so-called whisper

2) they also seem to think that joining a friend who is already in a queue is NOT equivalent to jumping a queue. i get it all the time while queuing in the cafeteria for food or simply when queuing up to use the microwave

Excuse myself people, for all the rambling. Truth is I am now sitting in the library, pissed off with all the "whispers" around me!!

When Words Can't Do Justice

2007-10-29T19:23:00.000+01:00

Similarity vs. Diversity

2007-10-28T14:50:00.000+01:00

Last weekend I went to visit a flat in the hope of securing a room. It had been difficult finding one due to my failure in the Castellano language department, and the fact that these people do not speak English doesn’t make it any better either. I was somehow lucky enough to stumble across this advertisement where the lady was able to communicate in English and we made an appointment to see each other. The very first minute we met I sensed the lady was feeling a lil' unease and my intuition turned out to be true…

1) As I was telling her about myself and how long I would be staying, she interrupted and told me that she was looking for someone who is willing to stay much longer (of course, something she never mentioned during our earlier communication)
2) After a quick tour of the house, she quoted me the price of the room which by the way, was 70 Euros MORE expensive than what I was told earlier

I somehow thanked her for showing me around (and for wasting my time) and as I was about to leave she started errr...'pouring her heart out'...
“Oh I don’t know if you would feel comfortable living with me…”
“I don’t know if we would be compatible together…”
“I don’t know your culture and you don’t know mine…”
“I wear shoes in the house…” (Simply because I asked her earlier whether it was ok to go into the house with my shoes on, duh. Maybe someone should tell this lady that in some part of the world people practice more hygiene and please, do not expect everyone to be exactly like you are because we are all different in our own special kind of way)

Alahai, rasa cam tgh go thru the 'Its-not-you-its-me' breaking up routine jek! Well silly me for not noticing earlier. I finally realized that the minute she saw me at the train station, she decided straight away that she didn’t want to live with me just because I was DIFFERENT.

The incident reminded me of my stay in Greece some time ago. Back then I had stayed with this precious 50+ year old Greek lady who couldn’t speak a word of English. On the first day that I met her, she told me to make use of the house as if it was my own; she even offered to cook for me everyday. As I was with a Greek friend at the moment, I asked this dear friend to explain to her about my limitations on food (it was difficult for me to explain about the Halal thingy as he spoke very little English, I decided to tell him I was some sort of vegetarian). I also told her that I would be buying my own utensils for cooking; quietly hoping the old lady wouldn’t be offended by my wishes. Not only that she gave me her new shining pot for my usage and told me not to waste any money on buying a new one, she even stopped eating meat altogether and became a vegetarian for three whole months! Till the end of the stay, I couldn’t really figure out what she did for a living due to our communication barrier, but from her modest way of living I figured she hadn't had much chance to travel across Europe, let alone in other parts of the world and meet people of all kinds. Yet this lady understood well what diversity was all about and treated me as if I was one of her kind despite of our differences. What a gem she was.

So my point is, instead of associating diversity with being different or bad or weird, or whatever negativity that some people have in their mind, aren’t we all plain human beings and isn’t that a good enough reason for us to respect and accept each other?

Ci Ci Ci....

2007-10-28T02:05:00.000+01:00

A dear friend said once it is easy to determine whether Miss Cikitita is being productive or just simply 'dynamic' behind her laptop without even taking a peek at what she's doing.

When she’s productive (read: working on her research project) you will hear a continuous yakking which usually consists of…

“Shitty!”
“Die la wanna finish this one document!!”
“I hate this…I hate this!!!”

……every 20 minutes.

But when she’s ‘dynamic’, she'll be so quite and will look so darn serious as if she’s planning to save the world (save the cheerleader, save the world...errr...?)

p/s: Btw, Miss Cikitita’s definition of being dynamic consists of blog hopping, e-mailing, youtubing, torrent-ing, YM-ing /Skype-ing. Sometimes to make herself feel better, Miss Cikitita would perform the act of ‘knowledge gathering’ from Wikipedia i.e finding out the life history of al-gore (hoi life history menteri sendirik tak pnah lak nk amik tau!). But of course that usually doesn’t last for long…she would eventually cut to the chase and go straight to the gossip column i.e finding out whether Kevin from Brothers & Sisters is really gay.

Sigh.

When will she be satisfied?

2007-10-18T16:11:00.001+02:00

Miss Cikitita gets bored easily especially when it comes to working on her research project. The only reason she flew down here was to see the world and take a break from her rat race life in her home country, and that's just about it. Though deep down she knows that she should be grateful with what life is offering her right now she can't help but yawn every now and then. Sometimes it is hard to believe that slightly a year ago Miss Cikitita was dragging her feet to go to her workplace and how she yearned for Friday to come so she can go dancing under the moonlight (read: lying on her bed reading a good book or going out for teh tarik session with good friends) No, no she was never the partying type of girl, not even now, but she had had her fair share of fun being around good friends. Miss Cikitita doesn't talk much except to people whom she is close to, which is not many, where she can go on and on yet with some she would slide the zipper on her mouth shut automatically.

The reason Miss Cikitita writes this blog is to keep her busy and keep in touch with friends all over. (Actually she is just finding excuses for not doing her research project, which is very, very bad)